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Musings of a former hula hoop champion
Brew Ha-Ha
Life in the Boomer Lane would like to go on record as saying that she is no fan of Starbucks. She finds the coffee bitter, over-brewed, and served too hot. However, she does understand that most True Americans do not share her sentiments, since she knows they spend most of their waking hours standing in […]
Mining My Mind
April 7, 2016
Life in the Boomer Lane has always believed that, if one changes enough diapers, makes enough visits to the pediatrician, and puts enough miles on the car driving to soccer games, one will ultimately be rewarded by having produced offspring who become not only functioning adults, but who actually find their parents worthy of their […]
What 70 Means
April 1, 2016
For thousands of years, people didn’t know what it meant to be 70-years-old. Large, surly animals, rotted teeth, and the plague were all standing by to end life well before that magic number. If you are inclined to believe the bible, a man named Methuselah lived 969 years. Meth, as he was affectionately called, […]
The Disturning Truth About How We Treat Our Pubic Hair
March 30, 2016
In this mostly (except for one hysterically non-correct presidential wannabe) politically correct world, abuse of any kind is considered unacceptable. An alert (and most likely having nothing better to do) reader has sent Life in the Boomer Lane an article about the latest form of abuse: pubic hair. Or, more specifically, how women injure […]
A Short Conversation Between Roger Stone and The National Enquirer
March 28, 2016
(Phone rings) National Enquirer, here. If it bites, we write. If it shrieks, we leak. If it smells, we yell. Uh, hi. I have a story that you guys should write. OK. Hillary Adopts Bill’s Alien Love Child? Elvis-Worshipping Tribe Found in Jungle? Brangelina Double Sex Change Surgery? GOP Considers Bigfoot Nomination? Severed […]
One Day U: Going Back to College for One Day
March 23, 2016
As brilliant and hilarious as Life in the Boomer lane’s posts may be, she never repeats subject matter within a few months. She is making an exception here. Back in November, she found out about One Day University, and attended one of their all-day sessions in Washington, DC . This year’s schedule is out now, […]
Study Finds Cat Owners to be Complete Losers
March 21, 2016
Throughout the history of the planet, most species have evolved in a predictable manner. The ones who avoided extinction became more adept at survival, either through brute force or through domestication. Only cats and Republicans refused to adapt, and both are currently suffering the consequences. We shall leave the Republicans to their own devices, while […]
Buying Stuff From China
March 14, 2016
China has been accused of a lot of bad things, lately. Donald Trump believes the Chinese started climate change. The recent discovery that Lumber Liquidators has been selling cacinogenic wood flooring from China has been all over the news. Added to that is carcinogenic drywall being sold throughout the US. What few people talk about, though, […]
Teaching Old People How to Drive Better
March 11, 2016
A close friend of Life in the Boomer Lane is now teaching an AARP refresher course for senior drivers. The class is being held in Florida, in an area known for chiropractors, podiatrists, and over-55 mobile home communities. LBL’s friend, whom we shall call Bernice (and Bernie for short, in honor of her favorite […]
Putting the Us Back in UterUs
March 9, 2016
Life in the Boomer Lane has noticed that, in addition to car keys, cell phones, and Kindles, she has also lost body parts. Her knee, brain cells, the better parts of several teeth, several inches of height, and her uterus are now history. She had thought these were gone for good, until she saw […]
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Life in the Boomer Lane 
April 11, 2016
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