Browsing All posts tagged under »scandal«

Furniture Shopping With Donald

October 8, 2016


  Donald, I’m so glad you suggested we go furniture shopping. I need a sectional real bad. It’s making me crazy. I think about sectionals all the time. My husband thinks I’m nuts. You came to the right person.  I know furniture. Nobody knows furniture like I do.  It’s furniture.  And I know it. Most […]

A Week of Penises

August 30, 2016


The current news about Anthony Weiner presents a unique problem to Life in the Boomer Lane. Having used all of her best humor in her previous two posts about him, she isn’t sure where to run with this latest inability Weiner has, to keep his penis in his pants. Weiner brings new meaning to the […]

A Phone Conversation Between Trump and His Financial Advisor

August 1, 2016


Joe, Donald here. I’m a little bit upset. And, as you know, no one can get as little bit upset as I can. It’s really extraordinary, when you think about it. I know, Donald. Can you get to the point? That Kahn person, who lost his son in Afghanistan, spoke at the Dem’s convention and […]

Brew Ha-Ha

April 11, 2016


Life in the Boomer Lane would like to go on record as saying that she is no fan of Starbucks. She finds the coffee bitter, over-brewed, and served too hot. However, she does understand that most True Americans do not share her sentiments, since she knows they spend most of their waking hours standing in […]

A Short Conversation Between Roger Stone and The National Enquirer

March 28, 2016


  (Phone rings) National Enquirer, here. If it bites, we write. If it shrieks, we leak. If it smells, we yell. Uh, hi. I have a story that you guys should write. OK.  Hillary Adopts Bill’s Alien Love Child?  Elvis-Worshipping Tribe Found in Jungle?   Brangelina Double Sex Change Surgery? GOP Considers Bigfoot Nomination? Severed […]

School for Scandal

July 29, 2013


Instructor: I’d like everybody’s attention, please. Welcome to “How to Respect Women,” a workshop tailored specifically for politicians. We will undo a lifetime of womanizing in two weeks. Are we ready? Eliot Spitzer: You have nice boobs, Teacher. Instructor: Mr Spitzer, we will refrain from references to female anatomy in this class. Is that understood? […]

Boomer Breasts and the State of the Planet

November 30, 2012


Boomer breasts, while going about their daily business in relative obscurity, have nonetheless unwittingly become symbols of the general state of our world. The Breaking up of the Polar Ice Caps: The southward journey of the Boomer breast is symbolic of the sinking of the polar ice caps, but because it is located in a […]