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Musings of a former hula hoop champion
Browsing All posts tagged under »children«
Expired Food for Expired People
One thing Life in the Boomer Lane knows is that, as we age, children, in the best of cases, can provide us a never-ending source of love, emotional support, and comments about our expired food products. Boomers have been attributed to a never-ending supply of many atrocities, chief among them the abysmal state of the […]
Take the Tooth, Leave the Money, and Go Away
October 15, 2018
There are only two times in a person’s life that they willfully eject body parts. One occurs with advancing age, when random body parts prolapse and peek out from their usual hiding places within the body. The other is during early elementary school years, when baby teeth pop out at random, in order to make […]
The Miracle of the Non-Seder
April 3, 2018
Saturday was the Annual Life in the Boomer Lane Seder. The Seder, for those readers whose understanding of the Jewish religion is limited to “Jesus was Jewish, right?” is a traditional meal to honor the Passover. The Passover, for those readers who are still stuck on how Jesus could be Jewish if he celebrated Christmas […]
Replacing A Baby With A Burrito
January 8, 2017
Life in the Boomer Lane is in Charleston, where Youngest Child and Daughter-in-Law have just produced their first child, after a mere 36-hour labor. DIL is a yoga and natural food devotee and so was the perfect subject for the doula’s attempt to place her body in more positions than are contained in the […]
Pre-Thanksgiving: Joyful Mayhem Involving Large Appliances
November 23, 2016
Life in the Boomer Lane has just hosted her children and grandchildren in a pre-Thanksgiving research project to test the theory that a house can hold 5.5 times the number of people it was designed to hold, as long as they are all related to each other. Six adults and five children occupied a space normally […]
Coming in Third
June 13, 2016
It’s pretty much a known fact that the diminutive size of First Newborns is, like Napoleon and smallpox, in inverse proportion to the upheaval they cause in people’s lives. While said newborns occupy their copious leisure time with sleeping, eating, and pooping, newly-minted parents create any number of mental crises over these seemingly innocent characteristics […]
Mining My Mind
April 7, 2016
Life in the Boomer Lane has always believed that, if one changes enough diapers, makes enough visits to the pediatrician, and puts enough miles on the car driving to soccer games, one will ultimately be rewarded by having produced offspring who become not only functioning adults, but who actually find their parents worthy of their […]
The History of Halloween
October 29, 2014
Halloween is the longest-running holiday ever in the history of the world, except for Take Your Pet to Work Day. Halloween culture can be traced back to the Druids, part of the Celtic culture. The Celts were a squirrelly lot. They had no central government, no big important person in charge of everyone, […]
The Difference Between A 1-Year-Old, A 3-Year-Old, A 5-Year-Old and a 67-Year-Old
June 26, 2014
Life in the Boomer Lane has just returned from Seattle, where she celebrated her granddaughter’s first birthday. She will leave for Brooklyn tomorrow, where she will celebrate her older grandson’s fifth birthday (June) and her younger grandson’s third birthday (July). She now shares certain observations with her readers about the behavior exhibited at these ages […]
An Archaeological Dig, Without Leaving Home
July 1, 2013
It occurred to me over the past year that my children will never remove the approximately 100 large boxes stored in my attic. They have good reasons, mostly consisting of “We have no place for it.” I even resorted to saying “When I die, all you will do is throw everything out in the trash […]
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Life in the Boomer Lane 
January 16, 2020
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