Browsing All posts tagged under »children«

Expired Food for Expired People

January 16, 2020

22

One thing Life in the Boomer Lane knows is that, as we age, children, in the best of cases, can provide us a never-ending source of love, emotional support, and comments about our expired food products. Boomers have been attributed to a never-ending supply of many atrocities, chief among them the abysmal state of the […]

Take the Tooth, Leave the Money, and Go Away

October 15, 2018

14

There are only two times in a person’s life that they willfully eject body parts. One occurs with advancing age, when random body parts prolapse and peek out from their usual hiding places within the body. The other is during early elementary school years, when baby teeth pop out at random, in order to make […]

The Miracle of the Non-Seder

April 3, 2018

22

Saturday was the Annual Life in the Boomer Lane Seder.  The Seder, for those readers whose understanding of the Jewish religion is limited to “Jesus was Jewish, right?”  is a traditional meal to honor the Passover.  The Passover, for those readers who are still stuck on how Jesus could be Jewish if he celebrated Christmas […]

Replacing A Baby With A Burrito

January 8, 2017

32

  Life in the Boomer Lane is in Charleston, where Youngest Child and Daughter-in-Law have just produced their first child, after a mere 36-hour labor. DIL is a yoga  and natural food devotee and so was the perfect subject for the doula’s attempt to place her body in more positions than are contained in the […]

Pre-Thanksgiving: Joyful Mayhem Involving Large Appliances

November 23, 2016

20

Life in the Boomer Lane has just hosted her children and grandchildren in a pre-Thanksgiving research project to test the theory that a house can hold 5.5 times the number of people it was designed to hold, as long as they are all related to each other. Six adults and five children occupied a space normally […]

Coming in Third

June 13, 2016

20

It’s pretty much a known fact that the diminutive size of First Newborns is, like Napoleon and smallpox, in inverse proportion to the upheaval they cause in people’s lives. While said newborns occupy their copious leisure time with sleeping, eating, and pooping, newly-minted parents create any number of mental crises over these seemingly innocent characteristics […]

Mining My Mind

April 7, 2016

19

Life in the Boomer Lane has always believed that, if one changes enough diapers, makes enough visits to the pediatrician, and puts enough miles on the car driving to soccer games, one will ultimately be rewarded by having produced offspring who become not only functioning adults, but who actually find their parents worthy of their […]