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Musings of a former hula hoop champion
Browsing All posts tagged under »life«
Bring Me the Head of the Pope
Some years back, Now Husband Dan acquired, in a very interesting and not-for-public consumption way, a much-larger-than life-size exact replica of the head of Pope John Paul II. The sculptor was a friend of his. We are neither Catholic nor Big Head collectors. For this reason,the larger-than-life-size likeness of a deceased pope’s head didn’t fit […]
Not the Oscars, But Sort of Better
May 25, 2011
This morning, after waking up, looking in the mirror and seeing two completely different people represented on my head, I began to muse on the medicinal uses of Spanx. It was then that my intellectual reverie was interrupted by being alerted that I had received a “Versatile Blogger Award” from Coming East. As the recipient, I must tell you […]
I’ll Have A Cut, Color, and Formaldehyde, Please
May 23, 2011
I have curly hair. No, wait. I have CURLY HAIR. Like in “You can be a really good person and deserve good things in life, but I am Your Hair and I will screw you everyday of your life by being completely out of control and no matter what you do I will make you […]
Communal Dressing Rooms: Where Dreams Go to Die
May 20, 2011
I’m just as evolved as the average woman. I’m smart, I’m funny, and I can sing “See You in September” backward. I paint, I write, I can still recite the entire introduction to the old TV show “Superman.” I’d say I have a pretty good self-image, except for two areas of life: finding myself at […]
Labor Days
May 19, 2011
Thanks to Newsweek, I now know that laughing gas is being touted as an aid during labor (the kind that ends in childbirth, rather than the kind that ends in a paycheck). This got me to thinking about my own labors, in 1975, 1976, and 1980. This was shortly after husbands began routinely appearing in […]
My Psychic Menage-A-Trois
May 15, 2011
To celebrate my birthday, two friends (Roni and Susan) and I went to a psychic. This was no ordinary psychic. This was a psychic who had been on TV and who cavorted with other famous psychics and who was here for a one-time-only event. I was sold. Count me in and take my hard-earned […]
Gotta Love Joisey
May 10, 2011
I’ve had several messages from the universe lately. Some people get messages from the universe about saving countries or leading their people to freedom or fighting for human rights. I’m not one of those people. Because I grew up in Phiadelphia, I get messages about New Jersey. I spent a lot of time at the […]
The Person Whisperer
May 7, 2011
I’ve been sick for the past few days. My vocalizations have become quite unique. If Donald Trump’s hair could talk, this is the voice it would have. I do a lot of whispering, so as to protect pregnant women and small children. Here’s what I discovered: Whisper, and the world whispers with you. Reveal […]
Foreign Accent Syndrome
May 5, 2011
I have just been informed of something out there that is waiting to strike me down. Along with global warming, snakehead fish, killer bees, the IRS, and Donald Trump, I now fear FOREIGN ACCENT SYNDROME. According to the Today Show, Karen Butler, a woman from Oregon (Oregon, for god’s sake) went in for routine oral surgery […]
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Life in the Boomer Lane 
May 26, 2011
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