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Musings of a former hula hoop champion
Why I Don’t Collect Things
September 27, 2010
by Life in the Boomer Lane
The members of my family were always avid collectors. My grandfather, in addition to collecting wives, used to bring discarded items home from abandoned properties that were undergoing renovation. He was a paperhanger, and he never saw an old item (or a young woman) he didn’t like. My grandmother (actually my step-grandmother and his second […]
Posted in: baby boomers, boomer humor, boomers, catalog, collections, commentary, family, humor, memories, mishaps, satire
Don't Fence Me In!
September 25, 2010
by Life in the Boomer Lane
I live in an urban area. My house is close enough to its side neighbors to be sexually active with them, if houses were so inclined. I’ve already written about my vegetable garden that was accessible only by trekking across the neighbor’s property. My backyard is average-size, with a charming designed-by-me two-level flagstone patio and a […]
Posted in: boomer humor, commentary, dining, entertaining, friendship, humor, neighborhood, neighbors, rant, satire
Don’t Fence Me In!
September 25, 2010
by Life in the Boomer Lane
I live in an urban area. My house is close enough to its side neighbors to be sexually active with them, if houses were so inclined. I’ve already written about my vegetable garden that was accessible only by trekking across the neighbor’s property. My backyard is average-size, with a charming designed-by-me two-level flagstone patio and a […]
Posted in: boomer humor, commentary, dining, entertaining, friendship, humor, neighborhood, neighbors, rant, satire
Things My Mother Warned Me About
September 23, 2010
by Life in the Boomer Lane
I found a dead squirrel in my driveway the other day. As soon as I saw it, I heard my mom’s voice, “Don’t pick it up. It is probably diseased and you will get sick and die if you touch it.” I told my friend Phyllis, who was visiting and was, at that moment, sitting […]
Posted in: aging, airplane, animals, baby boomers, boomer humor, boomers, commentary, family, fears, humor, memories, mishaps, mother, parent, satire
The Saga of the Little Pink Panties
September 22, 2010
by Life in the Boomer Lane
My nail lady, Tammy, who is now approaching 50, has finally officially entered the Universe of Perpetually Creative Brain Cells. Several months ago, Tammy’s husband was cleaning their house and, in the guest bedroom, he came across a pair of lacy bikini panties under the bed. They were pink, with little red hearts on them. […]
Posted in: aging, baby boomers, boomer humor, commentary, forgetfulness, humor, memory loss, mishaps
10 Things I learned From My High School Friends
September 20, 2010
by Life in the Boomer Lane
My high school buddies, Susan, Phyllis, and Judy, came to visit this past weekend. These are the ten things I learned from their visit: 10. Guests who arrive carrying their own two-litre bottles of Cherry Diet Coke may not be emotionally prepared to eat wholesome, organic food for the weekend 9. Anthony’s Pizza in Falls […]
Posted in: aging, baby boomers, boomer humor, boomers, commentary, friendship, high school, humor, memories, opinion, satire
A Trip to the Farmers Market
September 19, 2010
by Life in the Boomer Lane
I have three high school friends (Susan, Judy, Phyllis) driving down from Philly to visit me this weekend. In honor of the occasion, I decided to make a trip to the local farmers market, to bask in the whole touchy-feeliness of all that fresh, organic produce and homemade baked goods. That way, my friends could avail […]
Why I Like Being A Boomer
September 17, 2010
by Life in the Boomer Lane
I was talking to a friend of mine the other day who is two years older than me. At some point in the conversation, she said “I know that technically I’m not a Boomer, having been born one year before the era of Boomerdom began. But I still consider myself one.” I understand this. […]
Your Very Own Virtual Dating Assistant
September 15, 2010
by Life in the Boomer Lane
This month’s Marie Claire magazine informed Life in the Boomer Lane that successful professional women are paying ghost writers to communicate for them on dating sites like Match.com. Women who do this “tend to work a lot and do nice things for themselves. They go to the spa. They pay people to clean their house and […]
Posted in: humor, internet dating, Marie Claire, Match.com, online dating, opinion, pop culture, rant, satire
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Life in the Boomer Lane 
Why I Don't Collect Things
September 27, 2010
by Life in the Boomer Lane
7
The members of my family were always avid collectors. My grandfather, in addition to collecting wives, used to bring discarded items home from abandoned properties that were undergoing renovation. He was a paperhanger, and he never saw an old item (or a young woman) he didn’t like. My grandmother (actually my step-grandmother and his second […]