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Musings of a former hula hoop champion
Why Boomers Need TV Commercials
According to Forbes, Apple TV is working on a plan to pay cable companies to allow viewers to opt out of watching commercials. As a boomer, Life in the Boomer Lane will not know which medications she should be asking her doctor to give her. Worse, she won’t know about all the life-threatening side effects […]
The Vamoose Party
November 28, 2013
by Life in the Boomer Lane
Those of you who enjoy reading about fun travel and adventure have, no doubt, heard of the antics of the Donner Party, a California Trail wagon train of eighty-one American pioneers who in 1846 found themselves trapped by snow in the Sierra Nevada. Thirty-six members of the party perished as a result of starvation, exposure, […]
The Model and the Boomer
November 20, 2013
by Life in the Boomer Lane
It has come to Life in the Boomer Lane’s attention that if she doesn’t write about boomers soon, she might as well change her blog to Life in the General Doo-Doo Lane. To avoid this, she has returned to Boomerdom. Here goes: LBL loves shopping at Loehmanns. Aside from the discounts, it’s a store that […]
The Collision of Hanukkah and Thanksgiving
November 19, 2013
by Life in the Boomer Lane
This year, the first night of Hanukkah (or Chanukah, for those able to gargle while speaking) arrives on the evening before Thanksgiving. For Jews in the US, this presents the need for a serious reordering of brain cells. Hanukkah (literal translation: The Holiday We Get, Because Everyone Else gets Christmas) has, for thousands of years […]
How to Board A Plane
November 17, 2013
by Life in the Boomer Lane
Life in the Boomer Lane has had a lot of time lately to do an in-depth assessment of airline boarding policies. This has been done primarily while she has been boarding. And, since she has flown an inordinate number of times recently (due primarily to having three children in three completely different places, and […]
Boomers May Be Good Past Their Expiration Date
November 13, 2013
by Life in the Boomer Lane
For those of you who make food a part of your daily diet, you will be happy to know that expiration dates are, in effect, mere suggestions based on decades-old guesses of when food might be the freshest (not safest). The truth is that most products are perfectly fine beyond their sell-by dates. A new […]
The Unrecorded Interview Between Matt Lauer and Sarah Palin
November 12, 2013
by Life in the Boomer Lane
ML: Ms Palin, you and other tea partiers have been quite vocal in your opposition to the Presidents’s Affordable care Act. Can you please give us a run through of the health care plan that you would propose? SP: I’m glad you asked me that, Matt. Let’s be clear about one thing from the get-go. […]
NY Knish Factory Shortage Leads to Nationwide Shortage
November 11, 2013
by Life in the Boomer Lane
This was the disturbing headline on Yahoo News this morning. For those of you who have been living in a cardboard box in a basement in Wyoming for the past 30 years, a knish is a doughy pillow, stuffed with some delectable mixture of veggies or meat. Other cultures have their versions of the knish. […]
Butt Tag, Redefined
November 10, 2013
by Life in the Boomer Lane
My friend Susan, when she isn’t having dates with men who wear antlers or slippers out to dine, goes to weddings. Susan attends more weddings than a bag of rice. After she finished attending the weddings of her countless friends, she soon began attending the second weddings of some of them. Even while that round […]
An Open Letter to Kanye West
October 30, 2013
by Life in the Boomer Lane
Dear Kanye, You probably don’t have many post-menopausal white women in your fan base. The only reason I know who you are is because I read US Magazine on the treadmill. For that reason, I know that you sort of ruined Taylor Swifts’s big moment at the Grammys and that you are Kim Kardashian’s Baby […]
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November 30, 2013
by Life in the Boomer Lane
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