Single women over 50 who want to date have discovered the terrible truth: A lot of men over 50 don’t want to date them. So, to all you guys over 50: Put down the Viagra and spend a moment considering the seven reasons you should date women over 50.
1. Our biological clocks are gone forever (Or else, we have permanently misplaced them, along with our keys and cell phones). We’re not dating you because you’re good genetic material with whom to produce offspring. We simply enjoy your company.
2. We live alone. For most of our lives before age 50, we lived with other people. Sometimes, we even knew who they were. We shared our living space with parents, roommates, lovers, husbands, children, and assorted friends of our children who we discovered on couches, under beds, and in our garages. Now that we are alone (We think. We haven’t checked the garage lately), you get to be with us in a quiet, romantic setting. And you don’t have to wait in line to get to the bathroom.
3. We know that it is not our job to mold our partners. The phrase “I can change him” has been blasted out of our vocabulary by life experience. We have discovered that guys, unlike houses, are not Fixer Uppers. Part of the joy of being over 50 is that we now take people as they are. So settle down, relax, and be happy you made the cut.
4. We don’t endlessly discuss commitment. The question “Where is this relationship going?” is about as useful to us as “Where do you think my car is going?” when we have surrendered to the GPS Lady. The joy is that we don’t spend time now in search of commitment. We are too busy looking for our car keys.
5. We have our own money. We like being financially independent, and we like deciding what we do or don’t do with our own money. We might agree to split the bill at times, or even enjoy paying your way, as long as that doesn’t intimidate you. Bear in mind, though, that we do accept gifts, especially if we tell you what to buy us ahead of time.
6. You don’t have to spend every minute with us. We have a close network of female friends. We won’t drag you to craft fairs or flea markets, and you won’t have to drag us to wherever it is that men go (We still haven’t figured out where that is, exactly).
7. We will never ask you how we look in a dress, unless we have misplaced our glasses and can’t see ourselves in the mirror. If this happens, just say “Great.” Then find our glasses for us, please. Thanks.
Life in the Boomer Lane 
duk1959
November 9, 2010
This post must be based on research you did. 50 is a long way off for you.
lifeintheboomerlane
November 9, 2010
Ah, thanks. Actually I am a long way off. I’m 13 years past 50. And the years since have been great.
carldagostino
November 9, 2010
All of these reasons sound just wonderful and inviting. Why couldn’t you delightful and reasonable sounding gals been like this when you were in your twenties? We would still be married. I’ll cook, do my own laundry, leave the toilet seat any old way you want it. I will not, however, accept the baggage of your past and promise not to burden you with mine. Only caveat is you must laugh at my jokes and cartoons. And we can use our AARP and AAA to get discounts on everything together. I have Cigna health insurance.
lifeintheboomerlane
November 9, 2010
Serious moment here (I just hate those): All ages provide some kind of perspective on where we have been. OK, maybe a 20 year old has perspective only from elementary school, which might not be the best for building a lasting relationship. That’s not to say that some young marriages won’t be successful. But I do believe that, unless we are delusional, we do learn as we age. I tell people that it’s not a case of my ex being the bad guy and my Now Husband being great. It’s that I have changed. I know who I am now and I am happy with that person. Makes life so much easier.
sunshineinlondon
November 9, 2010
This is great, Renee. Well put. However, I’m glad I’m not single. Or 50. (I can’t say that for too much longer, though!)
Sunshine
lifeintheboomerlane
November 9, 2010
Thanks, Sunshine. I spend a lot of time talking to women of all ages, telling them how great the years after 50 are. (Some actually believe me.) But really, the sense of self, the creativity, the outward focus are so powerful. I would say I could write a book, but I’ve already written two about that. I’m really passionate about the topic. Single vs married is another thing entirely, but we cover that as well. So, welcome to 50, whenever that occurs!
sunshineinlondon
November 9, 2010
Thank you, Renee. I am less than a year shy of 50 and I must say, I agree with all that you say about what we become as we grow older. And grow into ourselves. I just mentioned the married part, because I’d be hopeless at dating, if I had to do that again!
Sunshine xx
writerwoman61
November 9, 2010
This is bang-on, Renée (especially #7), even though I’m eight months away from being 50 (certainly applicable to a lot of women dating in their 40’s, except for #2).
Another funny post!
Wendy
lifeintheboomerlane
November 9, 2010
Thanks, Wendy! And you are eight months away from an incredible birthday!
Joyce
November 9, 2010
I love this!
lifeintheboomerlane
November 9, 2010
Thanks! I loved writing it!
Gayane
November 9, 2010
Great post!
The independence is wonderful, the self reliance key. I travel when I want, cook or don’t cook when I want, sleep or don’t sleep when I want, fix things the way I want, when I want, no waiting for someone to take the time to do so. It makes me happy and doesn’t make anyone else unhappy. Selfish? maybe, but it took me more than 50 years to find myself and I like me.
lifeintheboomerlane
November 9, 2010
Amen!
Patricia
November 9, 2010
Fifty was my favorite birthday. And sixty was pretty good. A few years until seventy but if the body holds up I expect it will be okay. Not worried about my mind–I lost it before I was fifty and get a long quite nicely without it.
lifeintheboomerlane
November 9, 2010
Thanks for reading! Oh, I can seriously relate. I’ve been losing my mind for many decades. I’m wondering if I can tell people that I started perimenopause around age 11.
Master Kushikimi-San
November 10, 2010
BUT……#8: After about 6 months we’ll most likely leave you for a 22 year old who’s really into cougars.
Ninja Satire
http://www.ninjasatire.com
lifeintheboomerlane
November 10, 2010
Thanks for reading, MKS. I checked your blog. You are a funny guy. I might have to subscribe. BTW, your comment came in as Spam, but since I am a whore for comments, I will read anything that comes in. Re #8: Live it up.
Expressmom
November 10, 2010
Wonderful post! I can glimmer from here, at age 41, what you are referring to. I don’t have the energy for all the drama I did in my 20’s. Everything mattered, every single thing was critical. So much less matters now, I only have the energy for the truly important details of life.
Thanks for paving the way for those of us headed your way.
lifeintheboomerlane
November 10, 2010
And thanks for reading! And you are wise, indeed, to see how your life is becoming drama-free. I’ve co-authored two books for women over age 50, but you can’t imagine how many younger women can relate to what we write about. I remember being traumatized by turning 41, because it meant I was “headed toward 50.” I laugh now when I think of that. The years after 50 have been amazing.
slamdunk
November 10, 2010
Funny stuff. You raise some very good points.
lifeintheboomerlane
November 10, 2010
Thanks for reading. There are so many myths and misunderstandings and erroneous expectations that people have about “older women.” Time to set the record straight!
thysleroux
November 10, 2010
I thoroughly enjoyed this post.
There is enough material here that could fuel some of my cartoons for a while!
But that is beside the point, this is well-written, insightful and actually makes such a lot of sense!!
lifeintheboomerlane
November 10, 2010
Thanks so much. And if my writing can give you any material for your wonderful cartoons, so much the better!
Teri
November 10, 2010
Shoot, you made dating a woman over fifty sound so good I’m actually considering it at this point…(It MUST beat the heck out of dating divorced men in their thirties…)
WELL DONE!! Great post.
lifeintheboomerlane
November 10, 2010
Hey, thanks for reading. Funny response. Yes, I’ve had more than one friend tell me life would be so much easier if she were bi.
Laurel Host
November 12, 2010
Why would you think we have lost our cellphones and glasses?….we are organized, we haven’t given up on figuring out men…we know. Women over 50 are really the apex of the human animal!
It will amaze me if I hit submit as this type of article is as askew as a “Maxine” cartoon.
I do like to amaze myself!
lifeintheboomerlane
November 12, 2010
I love differences of opinion! And I love that you never misplace anything. My friends and I live in a whirlwind of misplaced objects. Good to know it’s not across the board. I don’t read cartoons so I can’t respond to the “Maxine” reference. I ran a speeddating company for several years and saw the misunderstandings that the sexes had about each other. Bravo to you if you’ve figured out men. My post was meant to be tongue-in-cheek. I’ve written some very serious pieces about women over 50. But I do absolutely agree that women over 50 are, in many ways, if not the apex, certainly more evolved in ways than other ages. We have a perspective that allows us to get past the nonsense and to create powerful, creative lives for ourselves and to impact the planet in powerful ways. The years after 50 have been amazing. Thanks for hitting the “Submit” button!
Amiable Amiable
November 13, 2010
Two months to go until I’m 50 and, after reading your post, becoming single! Your post made me laugh and cry at the same time. 😉
lifeintheboomerlane
November 13, 2010
Thanks for reading. You really are becoming single? I met my ex when I was 18, married at 22, separated at 45 and divorced at 51. Talk about an adjustment. It was Nightmare on Elm Street. But, not only did I survive, I became a diffreent person. I’ll never look back. And at age 59, I remarried. Life is amazing. Back then, I never thought I’d ever be able to say that. I write about some of that in our book. So many women can relate.
Amiable Amiable
November 14, 2010
No, I’m not becoming single … yet! I guess I shouldn’t joke about it, except I’ve found after 20+ years of marriage that it requires an enormous sense of humor. Both of your books are on my To Read List!