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Musings of a former hula hoop champion
Browsing All posts tagged under »satire«
Maidenform and the Maiden
July 26, 2012 by Life in the Boomer Lane
In a revolutionary discovery that is rewriting virtually everything we know about history except for the reason for the new TV reality show “Honey Boo Boo,” the University of Innsbruck said Wednesday that archeologists found four linen bras dating from the Middle Ages in an Austrian castle. It was not explained what archeologists were doing […]
Tom Cruise Has Nothing to Do With This
July 20, 2012 by Life in the Boomer Lane
An astute friend, who we will call “Ana,” in homage to Speaker7’s series of brilliant takeoffs on the 50 Shades of Grey books, has alerted Life in the Boomer Lane to the imminent resolution of all of our problems. In case you have been fretting about climate change, being upside down on your mortgage, or running out […]
Sex and the Sixty (Year Old) Sets Sail Again
July 17, 2012 by Life in the Boomer Lane
Susan, immortalized in my many previous Sex and the Sixty Year Old posts, is at it again. The girl just can’t stay away. This time, she is trying a new and improved dating site for folks over age 50. Her primary goal is not to meet men over 50. It is more about her getting […]
Navigating the Bridge to Nowhere
July 16, 2012 by Life in the Boomer Lane
The aging brain is like a GPS. You know where you are headed, and your brain appears to be perfectly capable of sending you there. But you notice with increasing frequency that you are told to make a right turn, then, when you do, to make a U-turn. You may ultimately get where you want […]
No Breast for the Weary
July 12, 2012 by Life in the Boomer Lane
On Wednesday I posted about my memorable phone dalliance with Carl, the Ahh Bra salesman. When I completed that post, I thought the subject was put to bed (in a manner of speaking). Lo and behold, I had totally forgotten that July 6 was National Braless Day, in which various celebs got to flaunt their […]
Let’s Talk Boobs
July 11, 2012 by Life in the Boomer Lane
Actually, let’s talk bras, even though they aren’t much fun to talk about. When we start wearing them, they are usually too big and they feel like alien beings have attached themselves to us. Our first heavy make out sessions can involve young men who have seemed up until that point perfectly normal, with all […]
Global Shvitzing
July 10, 2012 by Life in the Boomer Lane
(A certain amount of the following information came from The Huffington Post article titled, “Burning Up.” All quotes from NOAA, and Ann Coulter are true. All other quotes have been created by the blogger’s brain synapses, over which she has little control.) A new report finds that the past 12 months have been the warmest […]
Menopause on Pause
July 9, 2012 by Life in the Boomer Lane
Loyal reader and gifted fellow blogger Alaina Mabaso has alerted Life in the Boomer Lane to a phenomenon so shocking that LBL had a reason to spit out her organic vegetable slime concoction that she was drinking to atone for having eaten half of a half-gallon of butter pecan ice cream last night. According to The Week’s column […]
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Life in the Boomer Lane 
Boomer’s Guide to Nude Beach Success
July 27, 2012 by Life in the Boomer Lane
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Huff/post reports the following: The website Travel-Ticker.com recently conducted its annual summer intentions survey, and asked the following: If you were given the chance to do one crazy activity while on vacation that you wouldn’t attempt at home, what would it be? Some 27 percent of respondents chose skinny-dipping — and of that group, 67 […]