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Musings of a former hula hoop champion
Browsing All posts tagged under »sarcasm«
A Short Phone Conversation Between Mitt Romney and the IRS
September 26, 2012
This is the IRS, where our motto is “We will hold off your death, until you have paid your taxes.” Uh, hi. Hey, are you aware that I have been on hold for about two hours? I would ask you what your point was but it wouldn’t matter. How can I help you? Uh, yeah, […]
Would You Give Up Your Sex Life for A Good Parking Spot?
September 22, 2012
My friend Susan insists that when she isn’t having sex and doesn’t have the prospect of sex looming on the horizon, she has a Parking Fairy. When she is having sex or has the prospect of having sex, her Parking Fairy disappears. I can attest to this phenomenon. Or rather, I do have to take […]
Becoming A Smart Ass, the Cottonelle Way
September 19, 2012
I never thought I’d be writing a post about toilet paper. On the other hand, I also never thought I would have written posts about things spewing out of my nose, zombie pustules from outer space, and placentas. But when my palm is being greased (in a manner of speaking), I suppose I’ll write about […]
Breaking Bad: The Belt Buckle Version
September 19, 2012
What with all the recent antics involving Rick Santorum, Mitt Romney and the rise in women being encouraged to eat their placentas after giving birth, I totally forgot about one of the most memorable airport experiences I had on this most recent trip to Turkey. It occurred on the first leg of my journey, at […]
Travelling Light: No Suitcase and At Times, No Plane
September 12, 2012
Actual conversations held between 8/31/12 and 9/10/12 between an unnamed, not- famous-but-should-be blogger (LBL) and various representatives of airlines and airport security: 8/31/12 Frankfort, Germany LBL: Why have we been sitting at the gate for three hours? Lufthansa Rep: We are on strike. LBL: But I flew from DC to Frankfort. LR: We weren’t on strike […]
My Uterus, Myself
August 26, 2012
Todd Akin, when he isn’t advocating for an audit of the Federal Reserve System, has become a spokesperson for a return to medieval notions of women and fertility. It’s time to look at the belief system from which he obtains his knowledge about women’s bodies. And what better way to do this than to go […]
Fighting Terrorism With A Cheeseburger and Fries
August 24, 2012
A recent concern to the US military has been the rising number of “insider” attacks on our troops, specifically coming from Afghan police and soldiers. Marine Gen. John R. Allen, the top US commander in Afghanistan, speaking to reporters at the Pentagon from his headquarters in Kabul, said the reasons behind the attacks are not […]
My Brain is Akin From This Stuff
August 22, 2012
It’s tough to know which is of more concern at the moment, the fact that at least two elected officials have no knowledge of a woman’s anatomy, or that Mattel has created Drag Queen Barbie. Rep Todd Akin, a Republican Senator from Missouri, in a statement that set knowledge of human reproduction back about 50,000 […]
A Boomer Survival Guide to the End of Summer
August 21, 2012
If you live in the northern hemisphere, the technical end-of-summer will occur on September 22 this year. And, as in all previous years, this will be an afterthought to the general population. Squirrels are more conscious of the change of seasons, but, as they constitute a very small percentage of the subscribers to the blog, they […]
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Life in the Boomer Lane 
A Short Hiatus From Blogging
November 10, 2012
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Like Facebook, Twitter, and Donald Trump’s brain synapses, blogging imparts a belief that one’s thoughts are vital to the well-being of the planet. A vacation from blogging imparts an awareness that world events tend to continue with or without During my hiatus from blogging, a president got re-elected, after both parties spent the equivalent of […]