Life in the Boomer Lane, distracted by the political mayhem being perpetrated as we get closer to the 2016 election, has neglected her #1 goal in starting this blog: writing in an authentic, powerful, hilarious way about the aging process and the role of boomers in that process. For those readers who haven’t fallen asleep during the previous overly-long sentence, LBL has some good news for you. An alert reader sent LBL an article from the January 2016 edition of Real Simple magazine, titled “The Art of Aging.”
The daughter of writer Julianna Baggott decided to create a piece on the deterioration of the body for her art school sculpture class. She needed a model. She asked her mom to send her photos of her breasts. Baggott’s first response was a predictable “No.” Her second was to have her husband photograph her breasts and send the photos to her daughter.
LBL must, at this moment, insert her own two cents. Like many moms throughout history, LBL, herself, has done certain things she never thought she would, all in the name of supporting her children. She would detail some of them, but that would change the entire focus of the post and would give her beloved offspring the opportunity to roll their eyes and remind her that whatever she did didn’t erase years of Hot Pockets dinners and being forced to bring bags of home-popped popcorn to the movies.
To continue: The photography session provided Baggott, age 45, with yet one more opportunity to dwell in the Land of What-the Fuck-Happened-to-My-Face-and-Body?, a territory many women enter in their 40s and don’t exit until decades later, when either their macular degeneration or cataracts reach a point at which they must depend on memory to know what they look like. And memory is usually kind, indeed.
Baggott didn’t exit the Land of WTFHTMFAB, until her daughter texted her a photo of the finished art project. LBL has often said that great art, any form of art, teaches us more about ourselves than it does about the artist or the subject matter. Baggott’s daughter’s project: “a rough wooden roof, lit from within, protected a sculpture of (Baggott’s) torso…and where the womb would be, a kind of nest and delicately broken eggshell.”
The art wasn’t about sagging breats or loss of the ability to procreate. It was, for Baggott, “about shelter, the body as safe haven. It was about motherhood and childhood, both. It was about creating home and leaving home.”
Baggott saw herself anew in her daughter’s work. Will she continue to occassionally visit the Land of WTFHTMFAB? LBL believes she will. LBL, 23 years Baggott’s senior, knows for a fact that there are still many unhappy surprises that await Baggott, as she looks in the mirror in the years to come. But she also believes that Baggott’s visits will be shorter in duration and will include a perspective that hadn’t been there before.
The mirror, friend and foe to all of us throught the years, is, like everything else in life, a creation of our own reality. The power of art, both the visual and the written, is that it can help us to see the “reality” in any number of ways.
Those of us who start the new year with lists of resolutions should make the mirror #1. To see what is there and what isn’t. To see what makes us think, “What the fuck?” and to also see what gives us strength and what soothes us. To know that we are our own works of art, ever-changing and dispensing wisdom when needed. The years will be only as kind to us as we are to ourselves, and the mirror will reflect back to us only what we project.
Have a glorious, mirror-filled 2016.
virginiarapekits
December 27, 2015
check this out: http://www.nytimes.com/2015/12/27/nyregion/the-wisdom-of-the-aged.html?smid=fb-nytimes&smtyp=cur
Thank you! Marj Signer
Life in the Boomer Lane
December 30, 2015
Thanks for this. Great article. Will be the subject of a post next week.
ugiridharaprasad
December 27, 2015
Reblogged this on ugiridharaprasad.
Life in the Boomer Lane
December 28, 2015
Thanks for the reblog!
Shelley
December 27, 2015
My favorite part of this post? The last two sentences.
Life in the Boomer Lane
December 28, 2015
Ah, thanks, Shelley.
Andrew Reynolds
December 27, 2015
My dear old daddy use to say, “What’s this young kid doing looking out of this old face?”
Life in the Boomer Lane
December 28, 2015
It’s crazy, isn’t it?
Lunar Euphoria
December 27, 2015
Wow, this post is the best part of my day so far — and it’s been a pretty good day!
At 41 I’m just entering the Land of WTFHTMFAB? and it’s good to know there are fellow travelers.
Also? I am excited that you introduced me to a writer whose work I haven’t read. I’m google stalking her now and she’s going on my “To Read in 2016” list. Thanks!
Life in the Boomer Lane
December 28, 2015
So happy to have been of service. Listen, use your WTFHTMFAB sparingly. You’ll have tons of opportunities in the decades to come.
Barneysday
December 27, 2015
Thanks for a great reminder and support for what comes naturally. I, too seem to ask more frequently these days, “who’s that old guy looking back in the mirror?”
Life in the Boomer Lane
December 28, 2015
Life was probably a lot easier before the invention of mirrors and vision correction.
Elyse
December 27, 2015
Hmmmm. If the mirror will reflect back to us only what we project, I think I will be wine-filled when I look. That’ll improve the image from both sides.
Life in the Boomer Lane
December 28, 2015
Laughing.
Keith
December 27, 2015
Nonpartisan fact checkers say mirrors tell the truth. Dammit.
Life in the Boomer Lane
December 28, 2015
I ditto that.
Sylvia Morice
December 28, 2015
This made me chuckle and also forced me to consider, once again, my own breasts. I wrote a blog post about them earlier this fall and thought I’d share a link to it in case you’d like to feel better about the state of your own breasts (after you compare them to the ones I describe in my post). LOL
https://sylviamorice.wordpress.com/2015/10/08/when-did-my-breasts-turn-to-jelly/
Life in the Boomer Lane
December 28, 2015
A great post and completely horrific. Maybe I’ll wear a bra 24/7.
Gail Kaufman
December 28, 2015
“The years will be only as kind to us as we are to ourselves, and the mirror will reflect back to us only what we project.” – I really love those words.
Life in the Boomer Lane
December 28, 2015
Thanks, Gail!
Jean
December 29, 2015
May we be kind enough whenever we look at the mirror. Great post!
Life in the Boomer Lane
December 30, 2015
Thanks, Jean, and yes!
Little Voice
January 1, 2016
This is marvelous, and timely. Been looking in the mirror lately and wondering who is this person looking back at me? Some days I don’t know her. Sadly, I think I should wear more makeup, do something about my sagging arms, get airbrushed. Then reality sets in and I am acutely aware that I have earned this body, this face, this hair, and it is I. In living color.
Little Voice
January 1, 2016
Reblogged this on that little voice and commented:
This is a marvelous and timely post from Life in the Boomer Lane. I’ve been looking in the mirror lately and wondering who is this person looking back at me? Some days I don’t know her. Sadly, I think I should wear more makeup, do something about my sagging arms, get airbrushed. Then reality sets in and I am acutely aware that I have earned this body, this face, this hair, and it is I. In living color. Enjoy this insightful reblog.
amanpan
January 2, 2016
Great post. Right on track for those of us that are little older. Eventually, we all get older is doing it gracefully is key.
The Coastal Crone
January 15, 2016
At my age I can relate to this as I try to accept the body I see in the mirror. Perhaps I will try to think of my body as that “safe haven.”
Life in the Boomer Lane
January 15, 2016
It’s not always easy. I’ve come to terms with some of it, more and more as the years go by. I’ll admit, it’s a relief.