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Musings of a former hula hoop champion
Browsing All posts tagged under »sarcasm«
The Guys in the Cabin Next Door
Life in the Boomer Lane and a group of her friends rented a couple cabins this past weekend, in a spectacular wooded setting. Briefly imagine, if you will, LBL’s brilliant rendition of women bonding against a backdrop of nature’s endless bounty. Now, let’s cut to the chase: the guys in the cabin next door. […]
The Making of A Hula Hoop Champion
October 1, 2013
Life in the Boomer Lane’s Uncle Sid, an amateur photographer, left behind thousands of slides, photos, and dozens of old movie reels when he went to the great photography convention in the sky. Uncle Sid was not a creative type. His garden sprouted way more signs than anything else. Each flower, bush, vegetable, and herb […]
The Evolution of Wooing 1993-2013
September 20, 2013
The September issue of Elle Magazine (“Our Biggest Fashion Issue Ever! 650+ pages of approximately 1200 models who, all together, weigh less than this magazine!”) has an article titled “The Evolution of Wooing,” in which it details how the art of wooing has changed from 1993-1913. 1993: The world is a cold, heartless place, […]
The Cooler. The Jacket. The TSA.
September 13, 2013
There is only one way to end a perfect, blissful, stress-free vacation. And that is to create mayhem on the trip back. Logan Airport, Boston: Life in the Boomer Lane arrives via shuttle, after she and Now Husband have returned their rental car. Now Husband has two items, a small carry on and an empty […]
My Gift From Ahh Bra Means A Win For You
August 21, 2013
Life in the Boomer Lane is grateful that the long tradition of bestowing domesticated animals on others as gifts, has, with the exception of small pockets of the country, become passé. She is also grateful that, in this amazing and wondrous world of bloated information, celebs, governments and companies can capture every reference to themselves […]
Ah, Sugar Sugar
August 7, 2013
Life in the Boomer Lane’s definition of a perfect ménage-a-trois would be to have sex with Now Husband, while another man spoon feeds her coffee Haagen Dazs. The August issue of National Geographic is on board with this (the lust for sugar, not a threesome involving LBL). Their cover story is “Sugar Love (A not […]
Bag Lady Intervention
August 4, 2013
Life in the Boomer Lane recently read a cry for help that a woman posted on Vibrant Nation. Her life was being ruined by the size of her purse and the amount of stuff in it. The weight of the purse was creating a physical problem, and her husband refused to stick his hand in […]
Butts, Boobs, and Botox
August 2, 2013
Life in the Boomer Lane has noticed that every time she writes anything about plastic surgery, her comments are flooded by the likes of: Plastic surgery is disgusting. I would never alter my appearance in any way, shape, or form. Don’t we all have better things to spend our money on? With all the terrible […]
The Case Against Science
July 31, 2013
Kentucky, home of The Creation Museum, has now become a hotbed of controversy over the issue of teaching science to children. While some people (and you know who you are) may still believe that the world is flat and bloodletting the preferred way to cure what ails you, the US government is attempting to get […]
School for Scandal
July 29, 2013
Instructor: I’d like everybody’s attention, please. Welcome to “How to Respect Women,” a workshop tailored specifically for politicians. We will undo a lifetime of womanizing in two weeks. Are we ready? Eliot Spitzer: You have nice boobs, Teacher. Instructor: Mr Spitzer, we will refrain from references to female anatomy in this class. Is that understood? […]
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Life in the Boomer Lane 
October 8, 2013
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