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Musings of a former hula hoop champion
Browsing All Posts filed under »satire«
A Private Phone Conversation Between Ivana and Melania
(ringing phone) Melania: Hello? Ivana (growly voice): Is Donald there, please? I am a representative of some country. I know it’s you, Ivana. It’s not me. It’s someone else. Ivana, you’ve tried this before. And Donald isn’t here. He’s on the golf course. Which one? I’m not telling you. And you need to stop calling. […]
The Blouse Man vs The Dress Man
October 9, 2017
The Blouse Man (1999) was a film set in 1969, about an unfulfilled housewife (Diane Lane) who spends the summer in the Catskills, along with tons of other women and their kids. Her husband, like all the other working spouses, arrives each weekend, for the sole purpose of reminding her how boring her marriage has […]
How 140 Characters Will End the World
September 27, 2017
For those readers who are unable to follow the often confusing timeline of US/N Korean shenanigans, the following is a timeline (induced almost entirely by whatever is in Life in the Boomer Lane’s head this morning) of presidential Tweets, N Korean bleats, and administration tap dancing feet, regarding N Korea: […]
When Your Brain Has A Mind of Its Own
September 25, 2017
This month’s issue of AARP Magazine will be of special interest to those readers who frequently announce “The Devil made me do it,” when confronted with their own self-damaging and/or inexplicable behavior. With all due respect to The Devil, Life in the Boomer Lane believes said Devil has been working overtime to create any number […]
The Lost, the Misplaced, and the Other Stuff
September 22, 2017
Life in the Boomer Lane, like a lot of red-blooded, tax-fearing Americans, spends her days losing a lot of stuff. Much of this is actually misplaced, rather than lost. There is a fine, but important, distinction between the two. Here is a handy chart to know the difference: The following are items that usually get […]
A Turkish Shower
September 12, 2017
Let Life in the Boomer Lane start by saying that, during her recent trip to Istanbul, she spent a lot of time glued to CNN International, keeping track of Irma. Her son, various friends, and other family members were impacted. But, at some point, LBL did need to address personal hygiene take a shower. She […]
Perky in Turkey
September 4, 2017
Life in the Boomer Lane must write this blog post quickly, as she has just received an alert in her Inbox, shrieking “Hurry! This underwear deal expires soon!” She is quite anxious to read what this is all about, as, coincidently, she has an appointment today for a bra fitting at a very upscale bra […]
Mighty Mouse and You
August 11, 2017
Those readers who are convinced that North Korean missiles are now, even as we speak, headed this way, have no need to continue reading this blog post. If you truly believe you have mere moments left, you certainly don’t want to spend them wallowing in Life in the Boomer Lane’s depleted mental universe. Please come up […]
All Trump, All Real, News
August 3, 2017
Many of you may believe that there is no need for a news show devoted to The Long Red Tie, since CNN and MSNBC talk of little else. What more can possibly be covered, you ask. Not so fast with the assumptions. CNN and MSNBC, as we all now know, are fake news organizations, not […]
Your Shrinking Sperm Count
July 31, 2017
A note to male readers: While you have been otherwise occupied, following the astonishing array of daily antics being publicly unveiled by the Great Trump Travelling Medicine Show, your sperm count, oblivious to politics, has been reducing itself on a daily basis. According to many sources, sperm count is now down by 60% since 1973. […]
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Life in the Boomer Lane 
October 10, 2017
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