It’s three days later. Four days of Life in the Boomer Lane engaged in a wrestling match with herself. Good LBL vs Bad LBL. Good LBL believes in her heart of hearts that all human beings are equal. She believes that we all, no matter who or where we are, have the same basic needs. She believes that common ground is there, if we are willing to set aside our defenses and work toward the common good.
Bad LBL wants to stick out her foot and make Good LBL trip. Bad LBL doesn’t want compromise or conciliation or making nice. Bad LBL wants an uprising, a conflagration, a second Civil War. Bad LBL wants our next president to do something that will get him impeached or sent to jail. Bad LBL doesn’t want Obama to make nice to him or world leaders to promise cooperation or Michelle Obama to serve tea to the the future first lady. Bad LBL wants to see, up close and personal, that our next president is exactly who she believes he is, and that the fallout will be exactly what she believes it will be.
Bad LBL wants no one to show up to the inauguration. She wants his hotels to fail, his business dealings to evaporate, his daughter’s clothing line to collapse, and his sons to run out of hair gel. She wants something so bigly serious about him to be uncovered before the inauguration that he will never be sworn in, except to testify in court at his criminal trial.
Let’s be clear: LBL doesn’t like Bad LBL. It reminds her of the times she taught troubled kids and had to maintain a persona that went against her basic nature, in order to maintain classroom control. She rarely smiled. She certainly never cracked jokes. She set tough boundaries all over the place. She didn’t build a wall, but she would have if she could. She spent a lot of time silently saying to her students, “You don’t know this, but I’m really a good, funny, caring person.”
Right now, Bad LBL has the stranglehold on Good LBL. LBL, herself, just has to wait this out. Until she calms down. Until she finds a positive way to direct her energy and her resources. Until her sixth grandchild is born, due 15 days before the inauguration. She will focus on that, rather than on the scaffolding going up along Pennsylvania Ave.
She will wrap her new granddaughter in her arms and tell her that the great big world that she has just entered is a huge, scary, overwhelming, at times disappointing, but always glorious thing. That her great-grandparents came to this country in order to survive, and that others deserve that chance, as well. That, as a human being, it is her responsibility to leave this world in better shape than when she entered it. And, as a woman, it is her greatest responsibility to never allow anyone to grab her pussy, whether it be in the form of the unwanted attentions of a boy or the decisions made by an unjust government.
Kate Crimmins
November 11, 2016
I am having the same conflict. I’ve gotten over elections that didn’t go my way in the past. This time is different. I saw signs and don’t know how others missed them. Perhaps they did and didn’t care but they were important things. We as a nation complained about how nasty it was but we elected the man who set that bar. I don’t think it’s the end of the world. It’s just a time of uncertainty. Oddly enough the winner in this all was Obama. They are class act, both of them.
Life in the Boomer Lane
November 12, 2016
I’ll start by saying that, at least in all the years I have been aware of the presidency, I have never experienced such people as the Obamas: pure class in ever way. Class that doesn’t come from gold fixtures, private planes, or billions in the bank. I trusted them. And that’s saying a lot. You are correct about this being a time of uncertainty. I have my mental worst case scenario and my best. My worst case means the loss of this crazy and wonderful country in which I live. The best means that we will survive somehow, in diminished form.
Shelley
November 11, 2016
I’m right there with you.
Occasionally I emerge from my shocked state to enter my depressed state. Then I tell myself he is probably not as “terrific” as his supporters think or as big a “disaster” as the rest of us think, but probably somewhere in the middle. And then I read that he is considering Sarah Pain for Secretary of the Interior which sends me right back to shock and depression.
Life in the Boomer Lane
November 12, 2016
His considerations thus far for cabinet show a preference for two kinds of people: those who exhibit the most dangerous political beliefs and those who are clueless, but who amuse him in some way. And his appointment of his children to the transition team is a perfect indication of the rampant nepotism that we will be subjected to in the next four years.
Roxanne Jones
November 11, 2016
I hear you. Great post.
Roxanne Jones Freelance writer specializing in health & medicine Hurley Communications 207.829.2023 (office) 207.607.0210 (cell) roxanne@hurleycomm.com http://www.hurleycomm.com
Life in the Boomer Lane
November 12, 2016
Thanks, Roxanne, and thanks for reading.
Donna Cameron
November 11, 2016
I guess if anything has come from this devastating election, LBL, it is the confirmation of Walt Whitman’s assertion that we contain multitudes. My angry, bewildered, cynical side is front and center, warring with the numb, sad, resigned side. Both of those are clearing the crap and burning a path for my optimistic, loving, and hopefully kind side to re-emerge as the leader of the pack. And I just looked up to see an absolutely spectacular sunrise outside my window–a sign? I’m determined to come out of this stronger—and more vocal; perhaps America will, too. Thanks for a terrific post—both funny and honest.
Life in the Boomer Lane
November 12, 2016
Thanks, Donna. I’ve gone through numbness, anxiety, fear, anger, rage, and the feeling of being a total victim. I’m still all of those things. But I have now committed myself to activism. I can’t stand by and bitch. I never thought I’d be doing this at the age I am, but I will march, I will write letters, I will make my voice heard, starting with the Million Women March on January 21. Google it, and join us.
alifetraveled
November 12, 2016
Yes, we must act in defense of our country, our rights. Trump is still in the middle of a class action lawsuit regarding fraud by him, a trial due to start on Nov. 28. Now that the election is over, his lawyers want to postpone the trial until after his inauguration (which would provide grounds for impeachment) and he is banking on hiding behind the Presidency that he cannot be touched until he is out of office (courtesy of the Clinton years) and banking on the Republican party not to even instigate any investigation into him since they hold the majority in both Senate and House (for two years until the next elections for their seats). The man should not even be allowed the be inaugurated, let alone serve as a single day as President when his character is in such question.
Which brings me to the electoral college, which he himself denounced just a few years ago as not a true reflection of the popular vote. I’m sure he just loves them this week since this is how he got to be president-elect. There are 21 states in which the electoral voters is not required to vote the same as the popular consensus of the state. These are known as ‘Faithless Electors’. The electoral votes are not official until December and we can still make our voices heard before January.
There is a petition at https://www.change.org/p/electors-put-a-republican-in-the-white-house-who-is-not-donald-trump that while the faithless electors they may not necessarily change their vote from Republican to Democrat, they have the right to vote for some other person. If you are a registered voter in a state that allows faithless electors, you are urged to directly contact those electors and petition for someone other than Trump.
This is in addition to contacting all US Senators and Congressmen that a person of less than stellar character such as Trump be allowed to sit as President. We do not have to be conciliatory, we do not have to tolerate or accept his vitriol or his actions. We still have the right to free speech and to petition the government as we see fit until those rights are taken away. We must not let our rights be taken away like Russia under Putin, nor should we sit back and let a Hitler in the making act on the things he’s said he will do as President.
Life in the Boomer Lane
November 12, 2016
Thanks so much for these comments. I will check out the petition and encourage others to do so as well. I’ve just signed another petition, to abolish the electoral college. My fantasy is that one of Trump’s criminal actions comes to light before the inauguration.
Donna Cameron
November 14, 2016
Thanks for introducing me to the Women’s March on Washington, LBL. I did indeed google it and within an hour invited 15 women to join me. Got a couple of takers, so far. Maybe I’ll see you there….
Andrew Reynolds
November 11, 2016
You’ve described me so well. I am working very hard to keep good Andrew in control. Likely it will require making lots of sawdust in my workshop this weekend.
Life in the Boomer Lane
November 12, 2016
Thanks, Andrew. I hesitate to ask you just what you are creating in your workshop. A stockade?
Andrew Reynolds
November 12, 2016
Trebuchet. I believe the best defense is a good offense…
hmunro
November 11, 2016
You want his sons to run out of hair gel, LBL? What a *horrible* thing to say. HA HAAA! Although I did literally lol laugh at some of your witticisms, you’ve beautifully described the internal conflict so many of us are facing. Through it all I’m trying to remind ask myself, “What would Martin Luther King Jr. do?” And, “What would Gandhi do?” To paraphrase Nietzsche, we must be careful that in fighting monsters we don’t become monsters ourselves. Thank you for another of your hilarious-yet-deeply-thought-provoking posts.
Life in the Boomer Lane
November 12, 2016
Thanks so much for these comments. Many of us have been shaken to our core over this election. Yes, we must be careful not to become what we are fighting against. We are going to have to make our voices heard, somehow, while still retaining our fundamental values.
Rebecca Latson Photography
November 11, 2016
I have no such problems wrestling with the Bad Becky regarding this new P-elect. I see horrible things coming regarding open season on public hatred, the destruction of our national parks, and the erosion if not complete eradication on what little rights have been granted to women to make their own choices. I feel lucky I am past menopause so I don’t have to worry about birth control or an unwanted pregnancy or any of the other crap younger women will now be enduring even moreso than before. I’m pretty sure if my very religious white southern neighbors in my podunk Texas town discovered I am an atheist, my home would be burned or at the very least, graffiti scrawled all over the place. No, I don’t have any problem with the Bad Becky because the Bad Becky is far more realistic than the Good Becky. The Bad Becky thinks all that “let’s give ’em a chance and let bygones be bygones” is a load of bollocks and time will show it to be true.
Life in the Boomer Lane
November 12, 2016
It’s tough not to feel that way. I’m so glad I live in this little liberal bubble bordering DC. I would be wigging out even more if I were surrounded by Trumpers/Trumpites/Trumpzis. I have to keep reminding myself that they are people just like me. Most of the time, Bad LBL wins and says, “No, they are fucking not.”
Rebecca Latson Photography
November 12, 2016
I’m gonna remember “Trumpzis” Perfect! Thanks for a new word I can use on Facebook 🙂
Retirementallychallenged.com
November 11, 2016
I am still reeling from the results, going from disgust to outrage to disbelief, and back through the loop again. I wonder if I will see my good side again anytime soon.
Life in the Boomer Lane
November 12, 2016
Ah, yes. Our emotions are bouncing all ove the place. Activism, activism. I’ve declared a return to the 60s. I will march again, albeit now with an artificial knee.
alifetraveled
November 11, 2016
I cried when I read the news on Wednesday. I feel that I have witnessed the death of democracy, the right to free speech, the right to practice religion – for every citizen. The man wants to trample on the Constitution (yes, channeling ‘Field of Dreams’ here). The man intended and acted to divide this country with his vitriol and he succeeded. The popular vote supports that division.
I can’t even begin to imagine what the German people must think of him (and his victory) after it has taken generations for them to recover from Hitler and when they tore down a wall in their country – with the encouragement of a then-sitting U.S. president while this man talks about putting a wall around this country. And the French who gifted the Statue of Liberty to the citizens of U.S. not just in recognition of our independence from Britain but for our open arms to people around the world regardless of race or religion and our beliefs in freedom and liberty for all.
I both was saddened and cheered by the protestors standing up for the right to free speech against the man, and yet am horrified by the reports of swastikas and white supremacy and violence from his supporters. I am worried how this country will survive his presidency and if we will ever be able to repair the damage he already has and intends to inflict on the country in the future (in numerous ways), reversing 200 years of history and freedom, just to stroke his ego. With so many standing up against bullies, I am in shock that the biggest narcissistic bully will be in office. I too hope he never lives to step foot into office. God help us all – whoever you may deign Him to be.
“Is Fenway the one with the big green fence…”
Life in the Boomer Lane
November 12, 2016
The wave of authoritarian governments across Europe has been a huge red flag to me in recent years. The UK’s Brexit vote was the latest warning. One by one, I see people making choices based on fear of “other.” That was one part of Trump’s appeal. The moment he declared Obama to be “other,” back in 2008, and saw how immediately it resonated with people, he realized he had a powerful weapon at his disposal. We have been through periods in history like this, and I would say the world will survive. But we now have far more efficient ways to eliminate each other that we didn’t have then. And we have created a climate that is less able to support life on the planet with each passing day. The choices Trump will make about that will greatly accelerate the process. That, alone, may do us in.
The Laughing Duck
November 11, 2016
Honest and candid. Great way to balance between the two LBL. All things considered people just seem to want a piece of you, whether that be good or bad . I’m up in Canada and was asked today what my opinion and I wish I could encapsulate this message – particularly the last bit.
Life in the Boomer Lane
November 12, 2016
I envy you Canadians. You seem to be bucking the world trend right now.
Gail
November 11, 2016
When she’s old enough to understand, play your granddaughter the video of Seth Meyers who spoke to our future woman president, whoever and whenever that may be. That’s what I plan to do for my granddaughter.
Life in the Boomer Lane
November 12, 2016
I saw that video. It was great. I’m hoping that this election reignites the women’s movement. I will be honored to be a part of the Million Women March on January 21 in DC. Join us! I’m opening my home to people.
Janet Duval
November 11, 2016
Hello from Canada
We are almost universally aghast here. Like you, I fear for my six grandchildren. On the CBC today a climate scientist said Trump will kill more people by doing nothing about climate change, then in all his military engagements. Nothing scares me more.
I read that only 20% of Americans read a newspaper, that most get their info from social media echo chambers, where lies and conspiracy theories aren’t much challenged. I don’t know if the same is true here. I suppose it’s true that LBL is an echo chamber in itself.
I fear for your media: Trump will attack them. Perhaps it’s your celebrities and comedians who can best cut through the lies and racism and reach the most people.
Toronto elected as mayor a rich businessman who promised to cut taxes and help the little guy. His name was Rob Ford. We’ve been down this road before, and it didn’t work.
Life in the Boomer Lane
November 12, 2016
Outstanding comments, Janet. Yes, of all the rhetoric he spewed, I believe that his non-awareness of the reality of climate change will be the thing that does us in. We have all, this new president especially included, become a nation of people who process only the information that supports their already-held beliefs. There is no room for rational consideration or for compromise.
Johanna van Zanten
November 11, 2016
No reason to decide to be good or bad, but I do understand the feeling. I offer my condolances. I would see as an outsider from Canada and a fan of your blog, no reason to lull yourself to sleep, just to satisfy the good side of you. The alternative is to just be you and watch this new P Elect like a hawk, tell your delegate what you think, or whoever else is your rep, and keep alert, and please, keep sharing on your blog!
This must be just the last kick at the can by the fearful old boys club and their female supporters.
The next generation (how come the young haven’t they been let in yet?) will have to be supported, to take over soon.
Life in the Boomer Lane
November 12, 2016
Thanks for these comments, Johanna, as well as your condolances. Yes, I do believe activism is the key. And we must engage millenials, for sure. I will march with my artificial knee, and speak with the words that I remember at the moment. But I will keep going.
Bob
November 11, 2016
I suggest reading this, From my 32 year old niece. I heard yesterday from a person I volunteer with here in the Midwest that when discussing the protests he said “Trump will put a stop to this”. Scary.
http://www2.nybooks.com/daily/s3/nov/10/trump-election-autocracy-rules-for-survival.html
Life in the Boomer Lane
November 13, 2016
Thanks, Bob. Outstanding piece. I’ve just sent it on to my mailing list. I can’t see the divide as anything other than insurmountable, right now. Liberals have to become very focused and very active. But we also have to recognize that Trump supporters are far more than the unwashed masses we believed them to be. Trump supporters have to eventually recognize that their great white hope isn’t actually on their side. When reality sets in on both sides, maybe we can find common ground.
Sasha from Camac Street
November 11, 2016
I can’t stand to look at him or hear him speak; he is so repugnant. But, worse, it is now open season on minorities and women. Even if he tones down his rhetoric, his racist and mysoginistic followers now have license, in their twisted minds, to do as they please. As I write this, there is a news report on TV about black students at UPENN being “invited” to join a lynching group on social media.
Congrats on the upcoming baby! XOXO
Life in the Boomer Lane
November 12, 2016
Thanks, Sasha. Yes, the floodgates have been opened on all of the folks we try so hard to pretend don’t exist. But they do, and now they feel emboldened. I won’t sit this one out. If I had my old black armband from 1969, I’d start wearing it now. Hey, that actually gives me an idea. Thanks for the congrats. I am grateful beyond measure for my ever-growing family. Love–
jlheuer
November 11, 2016
I know just how you feel and I too (about 24 hours later) had to take to my blog and write out my frustration and depression. Then because of some comments I got I wrote again only this time I was a bit (just a bit) less emotional. I too, have an evil voice in my ear saying, ‘take heart, he will go down in flames’. But then that will take a lot of the country I love down too. I am conflicted for sure. I will not watch the inauguration and will turn him off or mute his ugly mouth every chance I get, maybe for 4 years.
Life in the Boomer Lane
November 13, 2016
I won’t watch the inauguration, either. It’s all too painful. But, as the hours go by, I am very clear about several things: 1. We must keep our voices heard. 2. We must encourage young people to become more politically active. 3. We must encourage women to run for public office. 4. We must LISTEN to the other side and provide solutions, rather then allowing a demogogue to prey on their fears.
Anonymous
November 12, 2016
I am appealing to my better side as well, but my bad side seems pretty sure that the president-elect has no better side. The very best I can believe of him – at this moment anyway – is that he is mentally ill. That does not reassure me.
Life in the Boomer Lane
November 13, 2016
He has a frightening personality defect, I’m sure.Worse, he has no attention span. It scares me to think of how little he will process when dealing with world leaders or listening to reports. Another man who merely allow his aides to run the show, which would be bad enough. But he would demand to make decisions, and that’s terrifying. For the moment, I’m focusing on activism. We have a voice. We have to use it.
MaryN
November 12, 2016
When I mailed in my ballot (for Hillary) in October, here in Florida, I made a note of it on my calendar. I also wrote a prediction that I thought Mr Orange would win. I felt that the media (except for his devoted Fox news media folks) was giving us all the reasons on why he would lose, and why he was a bad person etc.etc. But given that “He” told his supporters that the election was rigged, that Clinton was corrupt – over and over and over….Believe Me Bigly..he fueled a wave that I knew would sweep him into office. So I started my grieving back then and am continuing to work my way through the grief stages. I don’t know if I will reach that “Acceptance” part, but for my own health and well being – I will have to. I admire the fact the the Good LBL will be an activist and I wish for you success in yours and others efforts. Mr Orange will not be a good President, and our country will be diminished. His supporters will say, it already was diminished and getting worse. They will continue to cheer his every move. They themselves hate the establishment, and honestly think that Mr Orange will understand all the complexity of how the US Government works & functions, and handle it all better than anyone ever has bigly/big league. All it takes is a group of yes folks surrounding him and their constant adoration to get him through the day. The actual tasks of getting deals done and Bills passed, he will leave to those who love him or fear for their jobs if they don’t do as he wants. It won’t matter if things he says or want make sense or are unconstitutional or will not be accomplished easily, they will just accommodate him blindly. And wait till he uses as his excuse, “I had no idea, just how bad President Obama left our government in ruins” I know I won’t be able to watch his inauguration, and seeing President Obama hand off the Presidency to this awful awful orange man. I know that he does not understand the Bible he places his hand on, nor understand the Constitution that he will take an oath to protect. But I am also aware that his supporters will flood Washington that day, biggest crowds ever believe me, and it will buoy him up with the chants and clapping he feeds off of. On Facebook today folks are commenting on how Pat Boone told fox news that Mr Orange and his supporters – bitch slapped those in Hollywood who supported Hillary. I don’t think Pat Boone knows that Mr Orange craves such “celebrity” support. He has so far gotten the support of Scott Baio, Ted Nugent, football’s Tom Brady, and a couple others. Should be a grand celebration with that caliber of stars at his “ball” in the evening. I too am going to miss President Obama, his grace, his sense of humor, his proper usage of grammar and sentence structure. And of course his wonderful caring family. Take care of the good LBL, she & her sense of humor, will be needed the next four years. I look forward to your musings about Life in the Boomer Lane in this new orange era.
Life in the Boomer Lane
November 13, 2016
Thanks for these oh-so-well-considered comments, Mary. I’m trying to see this as a kick to our collective butt. Activism, engaging the younger generation, promoting female legislators, and truly listening to the other side (tough, but necessary). We can’t take anything for granted anymore. A president was just elected in fear. I won’t go there. And I’m totally prepared for all the Republicans who raged against him to meekly stand in line, waiting to lick his butt. That’s simply the nature of power. We exhibited the best of ourselves when we elected Obama. I hope I’m still alive when we again elect a president worthy of my respect.
Ellyn
November 13, 2016
Renee, you so captured exactly how I feel. Ironically, I, too have a new granddaughter due to enter the world (in a couple of weeks.) Thank you for putting to words so beautifully how I feel. In some ways it makes me feel a teensy bit better about this mess.
Life in the Boomer Lane
November 13, 2016
Thanks, Ellyn, and congrats on the impending birth of your new granddaughter. Today was an all-out Bad LBL day. First, I saw what Oprah said (“Oh how wonderful that Trump really did like Obama so much!!! It gives me hope for the world!!!) and I started knashing my teeth. Then, I read the transcript of the Leslie Stahl 60 Minutes interview with Trump. Stahl said he was “so much more serious,” and Trump went on an on about how great Obama was and the Clintons were, etc, etc, etc. It was just a fucking love fest. All this on the day that Steve Bannon, his new Svengali, wrote another Jew-bashing piece in Breitbart. What am I not seeing that these other people see? What am I seeing that they don’t? Today was a major setback.