Life in the Boomer Lane has reached an age that allows her to look back at all the great advice she has gotten over the decades and respond with flagrant disregard, or at least with a bit of tweaking. These include:
Act your age. LBL has been struggling with this one for decades, especially during sales meetings, speeches of any kind, and cocktail parties. Instead of acting her age, LBL commits to defining her age. It’s way easier that way and can include things like trying on ugly clothes in stores with friends and laughing until we pee in our pants.
Love conquers all. Love conquers nothing, although it’s a pleasant feeling, and everyone should have it in their lives. LBL commits to continuing to fiercely love those around her who have become part of her heart. But she will not believe that love, itself, will solve anything. For that, she commits to stay committed to the relationships and to be willing to give up being right, in order to create the healthiest relationship that can be.
If you don’t have anything good to say about someone, don’t say anything at all. LBL would have to seriously limit her blog topics, if she followed this rule. There are simply too many scary and/or stupid people out there, wielding too much power and influence, for her to remain silent. She commits, instead, to saying exactly what she thinks about any behavior that offends her. This is her blog, and she has no super PAC to answer to.
A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. This is great advice if one is starving or contemplating an offer on a piece of real estate. Not-so-great if one is living from one’s vision and the bird in the hand isn’t what one really wants. LBL commits to releasing the bird in the hand, when the two in the bush are more in alignment with her vision. If she falls into the bush and comes up empty-handed, she will check another bush.
If, at first, you don’t succeed, try, try again. LBL has learned that this won’t work, without modifying the attempt. She commits to taking a hard look at the actions that resulted in the failure and to being honest enough with herself to see that maybe the attempt needs some work.
With age comes wisdom. Age, itself, provides little more than a host of ailments to complain about. It does, however, provide perspective, if we get past ourselves enough to allow the perspective to appear. LBL commits to enhancing her perspective, rather than honing her wisdom. She will leave wisdom to the people who sit on mountains and don’t care about access to good coffee or Seven-11s.
Do the right thing. This would be swell, if everything in the world were neatly tagged as right or wrong. As the world becomes more complex, right and wrong becomes an unlimited range of grey. LBL commits to listening to the small voice within, that very often tells her exactly what she doesn’t want to hear. Then, instead of slapping it upside the head, she commits to doing what the voice says, and to keep her internal qvetching to a minimum.
Always wear clean underwear. LBL subscribes to this, in theory, although age has modified this desire a bit. As she ages, it is getting tougher and tougher to make it through the day with said clean underwear, especially when she is with friends, doing doofus things, or when she is coughing or running across the street or when she waits too long to hit the bathroom. For that reason, as time goes on, LBL places less and less value on clean underwear.
Here’s to 2015. May the pleasant surprises outnumber the expectations.
janeydoe57
December 31, 2014
Bwahaha! Love this! Favorite daughter and I make fun of clothes though we don’t try them on – we’d rather try on the cute ones. Now that she and I can’t shop together as often I send her photos of neon prom dresses and god-awful sequined sweaters so we can still share the experience.
I like your view of doing the right thing and JDB commits to listen to her own inner voice in 2015. But I ain’t talking back to it; that’ll get you locked up!
As for the always wearing clean underwear – I feel your pain or maybe not pain exactly…I should own stock in Poise is all I’m sayin’!
Life in the Boomer Lane
January 2, 2015
Thanks for these comments, Janey. LOVE the part about exchanging photos with BD. Once, a sales person watched what my friend and I were doing and then started bringing us hideous clothes to try on. I love enrolling people in my lunacy.
Val Boyko
December 31, 2014
Thank you for cracking me up so much in 2014!
Happy New Year to you and yours 🙂
Val x
Life in the Boomer Lane
January 2, 2015
You are welcome, Val. I will continue to spew, qvetch, and create personal drivel throughout the coming year. If readers crack up as a result, my life will continue to have meaning. If not, I will eat ice cream. .
wordsfromanneli
December 31, 2014
Looking forward to your posts next year.
Life in the Boomer Lane
January 2, 2015
As I look forward to your comments, Anneli.
btg5885
December 31, 2014
Renee, very funny. Age gives us greater opportunity to be less stupid. We have made more mistakes to learn from, yet some have chosen to not do so and remain in a fog. That includes avoiding the fools we suffered from when younger. My first resolution is to remain imperfect, which I figured I could keep. Happy New a Year. BTG
Life in the Boomer Lane
January 2, 2015
Love that, BTG. Remaining imperfect is a perfect goal.
Retirementallychallenged.com
December 31, 2014
Good to see that you won’t be making too many changes in 2015 (except maybe increased bio breaks), we kind of like you the way you are. Happy New Year, Renee!
Life in the Boomer Lane
January 2, 2015
Thanks. I do have goals for this blog in 2014. One is to figure out how-the-hell the Pinterest button works. The other is to find a topic that people respond to as enthusiastically as sex. I think that goal is hopeless.
sopranomom2
December 31, 2014
Could not agree with you more on all points but absolutely love how you put it into words. Yes, more pleasant surprises and fewer expectations. I’ll drink to that at midnight tonight.
Life in the Boomer Lane
January 2, 2015
Thanks, SM. I hope you did drink to that. Now Husband and I sailed right through midnight watching an episode of Black Mirror (seriously strange stuff). 2015 sneaked right up on us.
Joyce
December 31, 2014
You are such a wise and funny woman, and I can’t wait to see you and laugh until we pee our pants. Bring a huge supply of clean underwear. Love and Happy New Year.
Life in the Boomer Lane
January 2, 2015
I am counting the days, mini pads in tow.
Muddy River Muse
January 1, 2015
Words to live by! Happy New Year!
Life in the Boomer Lane
January 2, 2015
And the same to you, MRM!
revelationmuzic
January 1, 2015
Love it
Sent from my BlackBerry® wireless handheld from Glo Mobile.
Life in the Boomer Lane
January 2, 2015
Thanks. What’s a Glo Mobile?
valentinelogar
January 1, 2015
Well yes, exactly (especially the last).
Jubilant New Year and looking forward to your selection of topics in 2015.
Life in the Boomer Lane
January 2, 2015
Thanks, Valentine. Sex always gets the most hits, followed by Kanye West and deranged cats. Maybe I should write a post about Kanye having been caught having sex with a deranged cat.
valentinelogar
January 2, 2015
Well certainly having sex with something deranged and cats is close.
Kat
January 1, 2015
I can’t say I agree with all of it but I like your style. Happy New Year.
Life in the Boomer Lane
January 2, 2015
Thanks, Kat. Style always trumps logic, doesn’t it.
Elyse
January 1, 2015
Happy New Year, LBL. And I hope i won’t be the person who buys the ugly pants you and your friends just peed in.
Life in the Boomer Lane
January 2, 2015
Elyse, that might be one of the funniest comments anyone has ever contributed. Damn, I should write a post about funny comments.
Elyse
January 2, 2015
Sometimes I think I should just comment and not bother writing …
Life in the Boomer Lane
January 2, 2015
Now, that was also hilarious.
Paula J Wray
January 4, 2015
To think that clean underwear is now classified as one of my goals. . (And it is.) I am a sad and pitiful individual.