Older Men, Younger Women: Fact or Unicorn?

Posted on February 28, 2012


Way back in time, before most people had ever heard of Harold Camping or Denny’s Maple Bacon Sundae, I wrote a post titled  “The Myth of Older Men Wanting Younger Women.”   I didn’t intend it to be a tired diatribe of how men over a certain age want young babes.

What surprised me was not that some people missed the point of the post and made their case for the older/younger thing.  It was that over a year later, I’m still getting comments on the post.   So I feel the need to clarify:

I simply wrote about the following:

1. My disagreement with my friend Jean: Jean believes that older men want younger women.  I said I believed that not to be the case.  Jean and I disagree on a lot of things, or at least we used to.  Now, neither of us can remember any of our opinions about anything.  So age has greatly improved our communication with each other.

2. The Match.com/online  thing, in which older men express a preference for much younger women:  For the most part, I put this under the same category as man’s search for a non-caloric maple bacon sundae: It sounds good in theory.  But why not, as you sit alone in front of your laptop, clicking away, ask for youth, beauty, athletic prowess, and a huge bank account?  You have absolutely nothing to lose.

3. My experience running a speed dating company: Many older people of both sexes expressed a preference for dating younger (“People my age are too set in their ways.” “People my age aren’t active enough.”) But when people met face-to-face, connection occurred.  Every single time.

4. My friends: In my personal circle of friends (read that again,) almost all the couples are age-compatible.

That’s it.  I didn’t make fun of older people who are on the hunt for younger.  I hurled no epithets. I cast no aspersions. I didn’t even mention Hugh Hefner in the piece.  I didn’t refer to the 82-year-old Argentinean woman who married a 24-year-old man after being “engaged for several years.”

If you are in a certain older demographic and you are involved with/dating/married to a person in an entirely different demographic and the world is a perfect place and you have both deep intellectual connections and really hot sex, and you are twin souls and you breathe in unison, great.  I will repeat that: Great.  I will repeat that again, this time using bold capital letters: GREAT.  I have no stuff about any of that.  Positive relationships are positive, period.

Of course if one person is much older and the other one is much younger, you come perilously close to both parties being in diapers at the same time.  (Sorry, this is a humor blog, after all).  PLEASE DO NOT send me emails about sex and diapers. Unless you also send photos.