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Musings of a former hula hoop champion
Browsing All posts tagged under »research«
Alienation
November 28, 2012
World events have been happening so quickly in the past week that, midway through my consumption of a sweet potato and marshmallow casserole, I seriously considered blowing off the Post-Thanksgiving-Held-on-Actual-Thanksgiving Midnight Madness at the local Walmart in order to track events as they were unfolding. We shall begin with a discovery beneath the […]
If I’m Over 60, I Must Want More Children
November 17, 2012
More Magazine, in an eye-opening new survey of 1200 women age 60-95+, explored, among other areas, marriage, mommyhood, mates, and mistakes. While the overwhelming response of respondents was that life keeps getting better, and that, specifically, their happiest decade was after age 40 (81%), all that self-congratulatory drivel stops when the subject of parenting comes up. […]
Maidenform and the Maiden
July 26, 2012
In a revolutionary discovery that is rewriting virtually everything we know about history except for the reason for the new TV reality show “Honey Boo Boo,” the University of Innsbruck said Wednesday that archeologists found four linen bras dating from the Middle Ages in an Austrian castle. It was not explained what archeologists were doing […]
Global Shvitzing
July 10, 2012
(A certain amount of the following information came from The Huffington Post article titled, “Burning Up.” All quotes from NOAA, and Ann Coulter are true. All other quotes have been created by the blogger’s brain synapses, over which she has little control.) A new report finds that the past 12 months have been the warmest […]
Menopause on Pause
July 9, 2012
Loyal reader and gifted fellow blogger Alaina Mabaso has alerted Life in the Boomer Lane to a phenomenon so shocking that LBL had a reason to spit out her organic vegetable slime concoction that she was drinking to atone for having eaten half of a half-gallon of butter pecan ice cream last night. According to The Week’s column […]
Home Sweet HOME
July 8, 2012
Medieval peasant homes were simple wooden huts, usually consisting of one room. All other rooms were technically known as “outside.” Slightly-better-off peasants lived in huts with two rooms. There were no panes of glass in the windows, no chimney, no chairs. Peasants slept on straw and they did not have pillows. Instead they rested their […]
Get the Old Off the Road!
June 29, 2012
Getting old is no laughing matter, which is why it is so much fun making jokes about old people. Take driving, for example. As long as one isn’t driving in the same town as an old person, one can get a real chuckle out of the story of 86-year-old Margaret Lazor who drove her station wagon […]
Really Important Stuff That Happened When I Was Gone
June 20, 2012
Because the sum total of the money I have made from blogging approximates that of the current Greek GNP, and because I like to engage in frivolous activities like paying the mortgage, I decided to focus on my real estate career for a while, instead of on my keyboard. Stepping back from blogging for a […]
How to Sell to Boomer Women
June 8, 2012
According to eMarketer, “Boomers spend more time and money online than any other demographic. It is estimated that 78.2% of this cohort, or nearly 60 million adults, is online. Even as their numbers decline, that penetration rate (their words, not the words of this writer) will remain high through 2015. And they control more than […]
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Life in the Boomer Lane 
Boomer Breasts and the State of the Planet
November 30, 2012
27
Boomer breasts, while going about their daily business in relative obscurity, have nonetheless unwittingly become symbols of the general state of our world. The Breaking up of the Polar Ice Caps: The southward journey of the Boomer breast is symbolic of the sinking of the polar ice caps, but because it is located in a […]