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Musings of a former hula hoop champion
Browsing All Posts filed under »satire«
Where Are All the Older Single Men?
Older single women, have long pondered the enigma of the elusive older single male. Ask any married woman if she knows any single, eligible older women and she will rattle off any number of names. Ask if she knows older single men and she will either have no idea or will suggest Ralph, her husband’s […]
The Guys in the Cabin Next Door
October 8, 2013
Life in the Boomer Lane and a group of her friends rented a couple cabins this past weekend, in a spectacular wooded setting. Briefly imagine, if you will, LBL’s brilliant rendition of women bonding against a backdrop of nature’s endless bounty. Now, let’s cut to the chase: the guys in the cabin next door. […]
The Making of A Hula Hoop Champion
October 1, 2013
Life in the Boomer Lane’s Uncle Sid, an amateur photographer, left behind thousands of slides, photos, and dozens of old movie reels when he went to the great photography convention in the sky. Uncle Sid was not a creative type. His garden sprouted way more signs than anything else. Each flower, bush, vegetable, and herb […]
The Evolution of Wooing 1993-2013
September 20, 2013
The September issue of Elle Magazine (“Our Biggest Fashion Issue Ever! 650+ pages of approximately 1200 models who, all together, weigh less than this magazine!”) has an article titled “The Evolution of Wooing,” in which it details how the art of wooing has changed from 1993-1913. 1993: The world is a cold, heartless place, […]
If It’s Tuesday, This Must Be Fall
August 26, 2013
In years past, when Life in the Boomer Lane had three children at home, it was easy to know that summer was coming to an end. One tip-off was that there were no toys left in fewer than six pieces. A second was that her family had reached its critical mass of three trips to the […]
My Gift From Ahh Bra Means A Win For You
August 21, 2013
Life in the Boomer Lane is grateful that the long tradition of bestowing domesticated animals on others as gifts, has, with the exception of small pockets of the country, become passé. She is also grateful that, in this amazing and wondrous world of bloated information, celebs, governments and companies can capture every reference to themselves […]
How to Not Get Divorced
August 15, 2013
Because Life in the Boomer Lane forgot to bring to the gym her copy of Aristotle’s Nicomachean Ethics, the book she currently reading, she was forced to pick up a copy of the September issue of Glamour from the Gold’s magazine rack. Just when she was starting to carefully read “Readers Share Sex Things They […]
I’m Getting Older but Everything Else is Getting Younger
August 9, 2013
The greying of America is a well-accepted phenomenon. By 2050, the U.N. estimates for the first time ever, the world population will have more people over age 65 than children age 5 and younger. What is extremely critical about this statistic is that children age 5 and younger are in no way capable of taking […]
Ah, Sugar Sugar
August 7, 2013
Life in the Boomer Lane’s definition of a perfect ménage-a-trois would be to have sex with Now Husband, while another man spoon feeds her coffee Haagen Dazs. The August issue of National Geographic is on board with this (the lust for sugar, not a threesome involving LBL). Their cover story is “Sugar Love (A not […]
Bag Lady Intervention
August 4, 2013
Life in the Boomer Lane recently read a cry for help that a woman posted on Vibrant Nation. Her life was being ruined by the size of her purse and the amount of stuff in it. The weight of the purse was creating a physical problem, and her husband refused to stick his hand in […]
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Life in the Boomer Lane 
October 11, 2013
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