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Musings of a former hula hoop champion
Browsing All Posts filed under »boomer humor«
Lost in Space
Actual items LBL has lost, which are now orbiting the earth According to Newsweek, NASA scientists want to build a cheap, earthbound laser that could zap away the “space junk” orbiting the earth. The zapper wouldn’t make the items disappear. Rather it would simply push the debris further out into space, so that incoming spacecraft […]
That’s not my purse. It’s my kidney.
March 28, 2011 by Life in the Boomer Lane
In an attempt to add body snatching to the list of endangered job descriptions, scientists are perfecting ways to grow organs (the kind usually found inside the body) in a lab. These “bioartificial” organs are identical to the ones produced when your father grabbed his crotch one day and whispered sweet nothings into your mother’s […]
Ask Me About My Colonoscopy
March 19, 2011 by Life in the Boomer Lane
When burying people up to their necks in sand and releasing ants to crawl all over their heads became passe, someone invented the colonoscopy. Colonoscopies are especially important for people over the age of 50 because it provides them with the need for something that no one ever told them about and which can’t be spelled anyway. […]
Oh, Baby. Boomer.
March 10, 2011 by Life in the Boomer Lane
E-Science News has come out with an article detailing a 65 year-long study on Boomers by the Medical Research Council of Britain. The title of the article alone, “Baby Boomer Study Shows Importance of Childhood,” is vital to understanding how they become who they become. Mainly this involves the fact that, after years of research, scientists […]
The Oldest Living Boomer
March 3, 2011 by Life in the Boomer Lane
Old Boomer (but not Kathy) The Philadelphia Daily News (“Our motto: We aren’t the Inquirer and you’ve never heard of us but we are still here, just in case anyone is reading”) reported last November that Baby Boomer Number One is Happy and Healthy As She Nears 65. This might not have been hot news […]
I’ll Have What She’s Having: Boomers and Cosmetic Surgery
February 28, 2011 by Life in the Boomer Lane
Whether you are planning your next round of Botox or are satisfied with your face looking more and more like a road map of Pennsylvania, the statistics are undeniable: Boomers are having cosmetic surgery in record numbers. According to www. cosmeticsurgery.org, “Baby Boomers Keep Cosmetic Procedures on the Rise.” The American Society of Plastic Surgeons […]
Crib Shits
February 25, 2011 by Life in the Boomer Lane
First, this week, www.livelaughloveliquor.com has bestowed on me the Stylish Blogger Award, for which I am very grateful. LLLL is a very, very funny lady, whose material is the Universe of Satire. And I wanted to pass along a blog I just started following: www.mylittlespacebook.wordpress.com. I was hooked when I read her page “I Am.” […]
Women in Packaging
February 17, 2011 by Life in the Boomer Lane
The title of this post doesn’t refer to Angelina Jolie action figures or to or females with all of their body parts squished into Spanx. Women in Packaging, Inc is “an international, nonprofit, professional packaging organization dedicated to the growth and success of packaging professionals.” There. Now you know. In addition to Women in Packaging, […]
I did. I didn’t. I do:Boomers and Remarriage
February 14, 2011 by Life in the Boomer Lane
Statistics on US divorce rates vary wildly, from under 35% to over 125%, depending on which source you look at and how annoyed you are with your spouse at the moment. But, no matter how you slice it, Baby Boomers are getting divorced at a higher rate than their parents’ generation. One source quotes the […]
The Man’s Guide to Dating After 50
February 9, 2011 by Life in the Boomer Lane
Boomers, like many other people, feel the need to develop close, nurturing relationships with another human being, as well as to occasionally get a free meal at a nice restaurant. For this reason, Time reports that people over the age of 45 have stampeded in record numbers to online dating sites. Internet dating can lead […]
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Life in the Boomer Lane 
March 30, 2011 by Life in the Boomer Lane
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