I’d like to thank all the folks who responded to my Freshly Pressed post entitled “A Guide to Life After 50.” I’d especially like to thank the ones who commented using actual words contained in the English language. Many of you expressed comments that showed a real awareness of the world and of your place in it. These mostly came down to a profound appreciation of karaoke, Jello shots, and tattoos.
Several of you had important questions to ask, and I’d like to answer them now, before I forget that I ever even wrote this post.
Alaina Mabaso asks: Do you think it’s ok to wear beach-purchased t-shirts to bed?? What about on laundry day?
Alaina, I’d like to tell you it’s OK, but I’d also like you to imagine standing outside a burning building in the middle of the night, wearing something that says “Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful. Hate me because I have huge boobs.” Or I’d like you to imagine your washer overflowing, water pouring through the floor to the apartment under yours which is inahbited by an entire motorcycle gang who burst into your apartment to see you standing in ankle deep water, wearing something that says “I’m hotter than your girlfriend!”
Deliriously Devine says: “I’m loving the bit about all the flirting and can’t wait to find some juicy young thing (which now days qualifies as anyone under 40) and tell him he’s ‘hot’…or is it that he’s cute? Hot is out, right? Can I say ‘smoking’? I could squeeze a cheek as well, right? Face, of course!!!”
DD, I’m thinking that words come and word go, but butts are always here.
Chris White asks: Does this (post) cover life after 60 as well?
Chris, you’ll be happy to know that all of my posts are written to travel with you for the remainder of your time on earth.
Rowland Jones asks: Is flirting really essential?
Yes, Rowland, flirting is really essential if you are a woman. If you are a man, which I know you are (because you signed your comment “Mr Rowland Jones”), flirting with a woman young enough to be your daughter or granddaughter may result in criminal prosecution. But if you are a woman named Rowland, you have another problem entirely.
Cyprus Life in Pictures writes: “I just reached 53 this week and after reading this I really don’t know what I can do anymore. HELP!”
This is a huge problem for a lot of people, Cyprus. You can consult with someone about this, as long as they are not under the age of 35 or related to you. If they happen to be your adult children, they will most likely tell you to stay home and limit your activity to sending them large checks.
I’d also like to pass on the names of several blogs I have discovered from people who commented on my post or who were recommended to me by someone who commented on my post:
Ramblings and Rumblings is a seriously hilarious take on anything even vaguely associated with life. This woman speaks to me. In her latest post, Not Reading This is A Mortal Sin, she writes, “I like when people say ‘My sky deity is better than yours’ and then other people say “No–mine is better, prick!” and then the first people say ‘I’m going to blow you off this planet, assface, in the name of my sky deity’ and the other people say ‘I’d like to see you try it, dickweed. My sky deity is totally going to smite your sky deity’s ass.’” I. love. This. Woman.
Crabby Old Fart: I’m coming late to this party. Don already has legions of followers, and he deserves every single one of them. Even before you get to the actual posts, you can read his statement “My real friends are all dead,” followed by 41 Problems With Young People (The first is “They are too tall.”). His bio page says: “This is me. Name’s Don. I don’t care much for young people and I’m not too sure how I feel about you.” His Facebook fan page says he’s a widower and 83 years old. If he’s really a widower and if I weren’t married, I’d be calling him. Or stalking him.
Single Malt Monkey is a perfectly ordinary person, if your definition of “ordinary” is someone who is smart, funny, irreverant, though-provoking and who writes great poetry and prose, is a photographer, builds guitars and knows a hell of a lot about music. Al spent 30+ years in the corporate world, now wallows blissfully in the creative arts. You got my attention, Al, and that’s even without your hot photo.
And finally, this from Tony Rumans, who wanted me to see the Christmas card he sent out last year: http://www.tonyrumans.com/happy-holidays/
Alaina Mabaso
September 19, 2011
You are Ms. Freshly Pressed! I was happy to see you up there yet again. You deserve it, not just because you’re a good writer, but because you showcase a real range of stuff on your blog. Thanks for the shout-out here.
I feel compelled to add: NONE of my beach t-shirts say anything about boob size or relative attractiveness. They say “World Famous Conch Fritters and Garlic Chicken”, “Be Careful, Or You’ll End Up In My Novel”, or, simply, “Brigantine Beach”. The scenarios you offer fill me with abject horror and I don’t thank you for any of those images.
Given the age-related topic of your latest Freshly Pressed post, maybe your readers would like a recent post of mine called “A Letter To Older Generations Who Think They Had A Much More Risky, Hardcore Childhood Than Kids Today”. It’s a riff on that list that keeps getting passed around about how everyone over fifty survived drinking out of the hose and not wearing seat-belts: http://alainamabaso.wordpress.com/2011/09/07/were-surviving-a-letter-to-older-generations-who-think-they-had-a-much-more-risky-hardcore-childhood-than-kids-today/
lifeintheboomerlane
September 20, 2011
I am happy to give you a shout-out. Any time. Any place. I am gratified that your t-shirts don’t cross the line into poor taste. Feel free to flaunt them in the privacy of your own home. I will now read your blog post and hopefully my legion of followers (which seems to have rapidly settled back to my pre-FPed obscutiry) will do the same.
Alaina Mabaso
September 20, 2011
Great, I hope you enjoy it. Before I got Freshly Pressed I always wondered how much of a long-time term impact that would make on my blog, if it ever happened. It’s not huge, but definitely noticeable a few weeks later – plus lots of new subscribers.
I’ll take your advice and flaunt the shirts only for my husband and goldfish.
Kathryn McCullough
September 19, 2011
I especially love Chris White’s question about your post’s application to folks over 60. How great that you advice will follow him all the way to the grave. (An early one at that?) And what about after that? Then we can throw caution to the wind?
Kathy
lifeintheboomerlane
September 20, 2011
I’m working on a post-mortem program to provide my wisdom to those who have passed into the great beyond.
Carole
September 19, 2011
I’m in hospital at the moment, is it acceptable to flirt with the nurses (either sex)?
lifeintheboomerlane
September 20, 2011
Go for it. Whay are you in hospital?
Carole
September 20, 2011
General decrepitude!
k8edid
September 20, 2011
Ms. FP – as usual, very nice work. Thanks for passing on the names of the very entertaining bloggers. Also, I love your posts, but sometimes your comments are even more entertaining. Viva La Jello Shots.
lifeintheboomerlane
September 20, 2011
Since my brain can’t retain world events, or songs, or names of people, or anything even vaguely related to science or technology, it leaves a lot of space to come up with witty replies.
speaker7
September 20, 2011
Thanks so much for the shout out. Ever since I saw the photo on your freshly pressed post, I’ve been trying to recreate both outfits so I mostly want to thank you for that.
lifeintheboomerlane
September 20, 2011
It’s the goat that’s the tough part.
Tori Nelson
September 21, 2011
I’d like to take this opportunity to say ” I LOVE YOU, DONALD!”. This nicety probably made him puke, but I love his blog… even if he hates me and the other “tweet-farting youth of today” 🙂
lifeintheboomerlane
September 21, 2011
Perfectly said, you Tweet Farter, you.
Waist Pack
September 21, 2011
Just found your blog and writing. So wonderful and hilarious! I will be sharing it will all my boomer friends and my siblings. Mostly, I want them all to hear your advice on whether to wear those T shirts with odd sayings.
lifeintheboomerlane
September 21, 2011
Thanks for visiting Life in the Boomer Lane, WP. Share away. Being a self-proclaimed authority on anything is one of my great joys in life. My kids won’t listen, but maybe the rest of the world will.
youngamericanwisdom.com
September 21, 2011
Somehow I missed your big moment! Congratulations…you deserve it!
lifeintheboomerlane
September 21, 2011
Hey thanks. I used to think the world revolved around me. Then I started junior high. That cured me.