A Shopping Trip

Life in the Boomer Lane has a close friend who is a brilliant, highly accomplished visionary.  Listening to her is both mesmerizing and inspiring.  This weekend, she took a break from her international and political work in order to accompany LBL on a trip to a popular antiques/home accessories store.  The shopping trip went something like this:

LBL: These little bowls are amazing, but I seriously don’t need them.  Why spend so much money just to serve ice cream?

L: You have to think more broadly. Think fruit compote, tiny souffles, clafoutis.  These bowls go way beyond ice cream.  They cradle whatever is put in them.  They create the environment for the dessert,  in the same way the set sesigner creates the setting for the play. Plus, you can’t go wrong with those little roosters on them.

LBL: Oh, right, of course, I’ll get them.  What do you think of these throw rugs? They are really cool except this one looks like it is faded in spots.

L:   Ah, the Abrash in Abudhabi. Variations in color are a signal of hand-dyed yarn.

LBL: Is that near Qatar?  I’ll have to think about this then.

L: Good. Do you like this horse photo or that one?

LBL: I believe the one on this wall one is more evocative than anything else, and technically shouldn’t be called a photo. It provides a more visceral experience of riding, as opposed to the other, in which the brain simply recognizes “horse.”

L: That’s exactly what I was thinking.   You sound like you’ve ridden.

LBL: No, I’m afraid of heights and horses freak me out.  I actually don’t even like to look at the photo. But if I did want to look at it , it would be for me more like a simulation of what getting close to a horse would be like, if I weren’t freaked out and actually wanted to experience a horse.  So I could look at it, and mentally reach out.

L: You’re right. I need to get this. What do you think about oral sex?

LBL: I think that depends on whether you are talking about man on woman or woman on man or woman on woman or man on man. Take a look at those mixing bowls.  They are unique, right?

L: They are.  Look at the curve of the spout. They elevate the mixing bowl to an art piece, actually. In fact, there’s a distinct element of Brancusi about them. Woman on man.

LBL: I might consider these. Oh god, that little table is to die for, right? I have no place for it, though. Also I have a small mouth.  Even the dentist has a terrible time working on my teeth.  They have to use these things that keep my mouth open wide enough. I’m going to sell my house and get one with vast spaces that can hold all this stuff.

L: I know the feeling.  About the house size, not the mouth size.

LBL: You are lucky. You have a big house. What about that butcher block thing? I mean, that is a show stopper.  I’m not even sure what it is, but the patina evokes visions of early 20th century small town general stores. I can just picture pickle barrels, bolts of fabric, and penny candies.  Very Faulknerish. What do you think?

L: I think we should try these hats on and take silly pictures.

LBL: Great idea.