Constitution Constipation

Posted on December 5, 2022


Loyal Readers can be excused if they missed Trump’s latest post on Truth Social. After all, the World Cup and Herschel Walker’s mouth are sucking up most of the airtime now. In addition, there is the imminent appearance of Hanukkah and the fact that a Tortoise named Jonathan, the world’s oldest land animal, is about to turn 190 years old.

Here’s a recap: Trump, ever tenacious in regard to his own causes, has not given up on challenging the 2020 election results. After having exhausted all legal avenues, and, after having incited an ill-fated insurrection, he is now bringing his thoughts directly to the masses, or at least to the folks who read Truth Social.

Trump wrote about the 2020 presidential election being characterized by “MASSIVE & WIDESPREAD FRAUD & DECEPTION,” and suggested the country should “throw the Presidential Election Results of 2020 OUT and declare the RIGHTFUL WINNER, or…have a NEW ELECTION.” 

Then he added: “A Massive Fraud of this type and magnitude allows for the termination of all rules, regulations, and articles, even those found in the Constitution. Our great ‘Founders’ did not want, and would not condone, False & Fraudulent Elections!” 

LBL has read this post several times. She has identified several items that need clarification. One is that, if one has trampled one’s way through the justice system, to no avail, even when armed with countless lawyers who own really good suits, who then determines that there was massive and widespread fraud and deception? What legislative body exists after the justice system has been exhausted?

The second is that, the judicial system aside, if “massive and widespread fraud and deception” are, indeed, found in some alternate universe, and if all rules, regulations, and articles that are found in the Constitution are eliminated, what, then, constitutes “the country?” Without a government, who decides to throw the current president out? Who decides to hold a new election? Who identifies which articles in the Constitution are to be eliminated and which ones can stay, or to decide that the entire Constitution be tossed?

As there is no requirement for a president of the United States to be knowledgeable about the Constitution, and as there is also no requirement for a President of the US to be aware of history, much less matters pertaining to the Constitution, Mr Trump can be forgiven for his ignorance.

Republicans, when asked for a comment about Trump’s post, said “Oh yeah? What about Hunter Biden then? ” or “Don’t we have enough to worry about without bringing silly things like this up?” or “We should all be focused on the Georgia election” or the all time favorite, “Thoughts and prayers.”

A rash of new conspiracy theories hit the internet, as soon as Trump posted. The most popular was that the Constitution was created by Nancy Pelosi and the Deep State, in order to trap Donald Trump into saying something about it. Another was that if you read the Constitution backward, you will eventually come to a sentence that clearly states: “The 2020 election is a hoax, stubble on my sticky lips” and the complete, original uncensored version of the Kingsman’s 1964 hit single “Louie Louie.”

Online chatter also includes various organizations like the Proud Boys, Mein Kamph Reboot, Hobby Lobby and Chick-fil-a advocating for an assault on the National Archives. “Hang the Constitution!” is their new rallying cry, as well as, “We Never Asked for A Constitution, only for the Second Amendment!”

Trump, himself, when reminded that he swore to uphold the Constitution during his oath of office, said “A president should only swear to uphold himself. I wanted to rewrite the oath, but the Pelosi Dems and the RINOS had their way. When I am re-instated, you will see big changes to the oath. Big changes. Stand back and stand by.”

Posted in: politicians, politics