I’ve been sick for the past few days. My vocalizations have become quite unique. If Donald Trump’s hair could talk, this is the voice it would have. I do a lot of whispering, so as to protect pregnant women and small children. Here’s what I discovered: Whisper, and the world whispers with you. Reveal your true voice, and large dogs bite your kneecaps.
I had a settlement yesterday. I asked the lawyer a question, and he whispered his answer. Then he said, “Wait a minute. I don’t have to whisper!” I whispered, “That’s right. You don’t.” Whereupon he continued to whisper. It was a long, and ultimately confusing settlement. The sellers still don’t know what happened.
Yesterday, all of my children called to wish me a Happy Birthday. I whispered to all of them. Two whispered back. One hung up, thinking we had a bad connection. I’ll have the same thing to look forward to on Sunday, when they call me for Mothers Day.
Today I went to the pharmacy to fill my prescription. I handed it to the pharmacist and whispered “How long will that be?” She whispered back, “Oh you poor thing. Fifteen minutes. I hope you feel better soon.”
For her sake and others, I hope I do.